[Pachipro]

You set the second hand on your watch to the hour tone of NHK knowing that when the schedule says the train departs at 08:01 they mean it.

You see a long line outside of a Pachinko parlor in the afternoon and get in line for some easy money

You always have a package of tissues on your person

You also begin to carry around a shoulder bag that your sister mistakes for a "cool handbag"

You can fold your newspaper in quarters and read it in comfort in the packed train in the morning.

You're tired, so you get in line at Shinjuku station for the Odakyu-sen express train that departs in 20 minutes to ensure you get a seat.

You fall asleep on said train and awake exactly as your train is pulling into your station.

You actually look forward to going to the local bar to sing enka karaoke - in Japanese! And you have a "key bottle" of whiskey there.

The proprietors of the local stores know you by name.

You dream in Japanese

You actually look forward to eating a Japanese breakfast with natto, seaweed and fish!

You actually pay monthly to park your bicycle at a place near the station.

You look forward to watching Sazaesan on Sunday nights on TBS at 6:30 pm

You look forward to watching the 15 min serial on NHK at 8:15 in the morning and even record it in case you miss it.

You can sing the song for the Yodobashi camera commercial on TV: "Marui midori Yamanote sen, mannaka touru Chuo sen, Shinjuku Nishi guchi eki no mae, camera no Yodobashi Camera" as well as many other commercials

Motorcycles delivering the newspaper at 3:30 am doesn't bother you anymore and neither do the incessent sirens of police and ambulances at all hours of the night.

You actually beat your own futon in the mornings and the neighbor ladies just smile at you while you neatly hang your wash on the clothes poles.

You instinctively nod to your neighbors and greet them when walking to the station in the morning and you even nod back to the newscaster on TV when he/she signs off!

You walk around the local supermarket with a toothpick.

You tell people drinking alcohol is one of your hobbies

You wait for J-women to make the first move knowing that they eventually will.

The first thing you do in the morning or when you get home is heat up hot water and put it in the thermos so you'll have hot water for tea or Nescafe Instant Coffee.

The only furniture in your house is a kotatsu, a clothes closet, and a couple of "color boxes".

You actually fold up your futon and put it away in the morning!

You think spending 8,000 yen for fine sushi and beer is not bad, but US$80 in the US? That's outrageous! What a rip-off!

You take a hot bath daily