Quote:
Originally Posted by Kal3ido
Im not implying that evey single African American has bad values. And other race's don't have any either. I lived in a couple different places in NYC and(going of my personal experiences) 80% of the black kids have bad values or none at all. They limit them selves to what they see on tv and what goes on around them. Since everyone is so intent on giving there opinions. So your parents instilled good values into you, what about my parents? They installed good ones into us, but out of the three, Im the only one succeeding. Im not saying because I didnt have a picket fence, that it means my parents did not install go values into us. Yes! I have been in trouble with the law, was never in that top 50% of my class and I even been suspended from school on accounts. I never stole, or been disrespectable though. Believe me, I worked hard to get to where I am at now. I rose above what everyone thought I would be, which is pretty much nothing. I always been told it takes a village to raise a child. If that's the case, then if I live in a negative enviroment almost all my life, your thinking might also turn to these negative way's. I never had anyone else, but my mom to encourage me to do better and push me forward. Believe you me, I have seen rock bottom and that's where most of my African American friends are. They either have babies and are not trying to do anything with themselves or their dead. It's not impossiable to rise up against the odds and do better, im a prime example and so are many others. Maybe I'll record my daily life and put it on you tube or something. This would also make a great debate for my club, lol
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You can't even say that 80% of African Americans in NYC have bad values and you sure as hell can't blame it on the media. People limiting themselves to what they see on t.v., again, is something that happens in every race. I feel sorry that you let what you 'percieve' the majority of the African American culture stands for roll over in your decisions for having a child. It makes me sad. A lot of people have seen rock bottom and they know that they'll probably stay there, but they deal with it the best they can. Black, White, Hispanic, European, Asian, African, it doesn't matter dammit. You instill in your child what you think is right. And what the hell says that if you raise your child 'Japanese' that it won't turn out to be a delinquent. You. Don't. Know. Don't use 'culture' as an excuse for wanting to live through your child. There is a difference in wanting your child to have a better life than you had and wanting your child to live the life you
didn't have. Do not try to live your life through your child. And yes we are giving our opinions, you asked for them.
But, the fact of the matter is that you probably won't be able to adopt a Japanese child because, as many others have already said:
-They don't NEED to be adopted in dire way that children in other countries do.
-You are American. Priority will go to Japanese parents
-You are planning to be a single parent. (Should you still decide that) Before you start talking about adoption, you should know that in ANY country they are wary about giving children to single parents. Why rob a child the chance of having a mother and a father just because, in your case, you want 'a child whose culture has good values...'
-You are black. Yes, I'm sure technically this should have no influence on anything because people aren't supposed to be racist and blah blah blah. In reality, I believe it will have somewhat of an influence on whether or not they would decide to hand you a child.
Point blank: You need to rethink this.