02-05-2008, 01:56 AM
I noticed you used Aruarian Dance from Nujabes lol
I love NUJABES!
I'm a big follower of hip hop so I may come off blunt.
The lyrics were good, I can tell you put thought into it,
but it doesn't feel genuine to me, what you rap about,
it sounds generic in a sense that anyone can rhyme....
don't take it too personally, I know youre starting out,
but overall it was okay. I like your voice for one, your flow
is pretty good but just the lyrics didn't really affect me or
anything which is something I expect for using Aruarian Dance!
That beat has so much depth in the loop itself.
As I said, overall it was okay and I do think your flow is smooth.
Just a little advice though, I know it as just a demo, but
when you use random noises like talking or laughing, you
might want to transition it a bit smoother. It was hard to
listen to the middle of the song when you guys start talking
randomly. I see what you're trying to do though, alot of rap
songs have a conversational transition, but you really have to
make it work.
Anyway sorry again if I come off a bit strong, but I am
a hip hop JUNKY, and I won't let it go too easily xP
You are an aspiring artist though, keep doing what you do
and you'll improve.
"hey souljah boy, can i.... YAHH TRICK YAHHH!!!!!"
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