Quote:
Originally Posted by Sangetsu
There are a lot of nonsense replies in this thread. It's not difficult to raise a child, how many children do you see on any given day? People who waste too much time thinking about the particulars often overlook the bigger picture.
Firstly, there is no perfect time to have a child. You can say "I'll wait until I'm 30" only to find that you are too busy with other things when the time comes. Let things occur naturally, and the child will come when nature decides.
I've already said that it isn't difficult to raise a child, pretty much anyone can do it. But raising a child properly is another matter. Each person's definition of "properly" is probably a little different, but the basic idea is the same; you want your child to grow up to be an honest and responsible person.
In order to teach honesty and responsibility, you need to practice them yourself. Children learn more by example than by any other means. Do not lie to your children, and be sure to teach them that there are consequences for all actions in life, good and bad.
Don't be too much of a "friend" to your children. You are a parent, not a friend. Let them explore, let them experiment, but set firm boundaries. Some actions are unacceptable, and the earlier they learn that, the less grief they (and you) will experience later on in life.
Keep an eye on your children's friends. There will always be at least one bad one; children learn as much from their friends as they do from their parents. When children have problems in life and in school, it is often due to a lack of attention from their parents, and this lack is often made up for by their friends. Like it or not, children often behave like their friends do, if these friends are good, it's not a problem, but if they are bad, then your child may begin to behave as they do.
Raising children is an important responsibility, the most important. Once you have children, everything else become secondary. We live on through our children, and the natural way of things is that we prepare our children for life so that theirs is at least a little better than ours.
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Sangetsu's advice is top class. Everyone should read it.
I also want to bold out that fact that there's not one given way to raise a child every parent is different, the media bulls when they tell you how a parent should be. A parent should act responsibly depending on the situation. You Must act as a parent when raising him/her, and then later on in life when they are old enough they can be your friend. =]
If you think of your child as a friend you'll have problems raising them in their teen years.