[Saffron]

I have sympathy for what you wrote. I also understand what you are going through. I went through something like it when I was your age. If you feel you are not loved then it is really hard to love yourself. You might think you are ugly but maybe other people do not think so. Personally I feel that for you to even like yourself, you need to feel affection from others. If you want a girlfriend maybe you should try internet dating because then a girl can get to know you first and like you for being yourself. Not all girls just go for good looking guys.