Lolitas in the United States... I don't see many, and my sister-in-law is the only one I know, and she's hardcore. I saw a couple yesterday in San Francisco at Japan Town, but I guess that's to be expected ;]
Best way to find lolita is online, unless you live in Japan.
I don't know if these sites have been mentioned yet, but
eBay Store - REFUSE TO BE USUAL: PUNK ROCK JROCK, GOTHIC LOLITA, JAPAN URBAN DIY and
Fanplusfriend Garden, Gothic Lolita, Man's Goth,Cosplay are both awesome, and my favorites.