Quote:
Originally Posted by Keaton421
Actually, my (Japanese) girlfriend has said this a lot too.
She says that in physique, Japanese males look weak (silly, effeminate hairstyles and stupid trendy clothes), and they don't possess qualities she considers manly, like any southern gentleman should be an expert in - independence, unwavering loyalty, honesty and honor, utmost respect for women, chivalry, fatherly qualities, decisive, stuff like that.
Japanese guys tend to be effeminate, clingy, and immature. And in general, they really don't know how to make a woman happy - they're mama's boys.
You won't read this in any book, but she said that Japanese men still subscribe to the Samurai way of treating women, as compared to the European knight; it's alright to love your wife and defend her honor, but you're above her and you shouldn't show too much love.
Her words, not mine
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My wife agrees with this too. She says most (again not all) wants a woman to take care of them and that the woman should just agree with him even if it is something that she really is against. Also, she feels that Japanese men are not taught to show their feelings and that loving their woman is just something they should know and never should have to show.
My wife was amazed that I told my Japanese friends that I loved her even when she was sitting right there. She told me that it would never happen if she was with a Japanese guy.
Have you ever heard of a Narita divorce? That is when newlyweds come back from a honeymoon only to get a divorce. On the honeymoon the woman must take charge because the guy is too scared or withdrawn to ask for anything and the woman takes this as a sign of weakness. She sees that her life will be this way and decides to leave.
On the other hand, Japanese women are fed this stuff about western men being a certain way too (strong, straight forward, loving. etc). This is also a generalization.
As for the comment about Japan would have died out if the women felt this way about Japanese men. Japan has been a closed society until recently. If you don't see anything different you can't miss it and if you have no choice you take what is available.
I can see that Japan is starting to act more westernized and the younger people are changing. I don't know if it is good or bad but maybe we will lose what makes Japan so beautiful and unique. Just my opinion.