[JBaymore]

Originally Posted by darksyndrem

You guys have been a HUGE help, and JBaymore, I think your right about having a talk with the parents. And with it being an underlying reason, your probably right as well. I really don't know what the real reason may be, but like you said me growing up, is a very likely reason. I also don't think my parents quite understand the whole host parenting thing yet (I don't quite understand it yet either) but with what you guys have said about how responsibility is taken in Japan, I think that will be quite reassuring.

Darksyndrem,

Thanks. Go for it. A long frank talk about life and growing up and risk and trust.

Another thing to think about here is the concept of "Great risk, great reward."

The most important experiences in life come not when you are ultra, ultra careful, but when you take some calculated risk. If you "play it safe and comfortable" all the time, it is true that you will tend to be "safe", but you will ALSO miss out on SO much opportunity that potentially awaits you. You will not grow.

Some people have trouble with even allowing others to be looking at "new ideas" because that can force THEM to confront those same new ideas themselves and evaluate their own belief structure's as to the meaning and validity of those new ideas. This can be uncomfortable. Your "thinking outside the box" is going to force your parents to ALSO take a serious look at the outside of the box.

You will return from Japan a different person from the one who left home. Trust me on that one.

Unless they have traveled there too, you will have a "worldly" understanding and experience base that your parents do not, and can't fully understand. THAT can be a very uncomfortable idea for a parent. In fact, it can be downright threatening. It is about relinquishing "control".

So give them some credit for the reluctance; this idea is a difficult one for THEM also. Just try to show them that you are mature enough to take on this challenge responsibly.

best,

....................john