Quote:
Originally Posted by MMM
Mercedesjin, if you don't like the answers, then please stop asking the questions.
A cultural exchange is a Japanese family hosts you and teaches you about Japan and then you host a Japanese kid and teach them about the West Indies. I think you are assuming a little too much that your visit to Japan is a 50-50 exchange. I don't see it that way. Yes, of course you are going to bring some of your culture with you to share with them. I am going to guess you wear shoes in the house in the West Indies. Are you going to show that part of the culture, too? No, of course not. That would be offensive.
I am saying the same thing is true of facial piercings. You asked for advice and I gave it, do with it what you want.
Regarding seafood. 1) If you say you cannot eat seafood, then the family is not going to eat seafood while you are there. Period. Especially if you say something so offensive as "watching them eat it will me you physically ill." That is the same as saying "I think you eat garbage." Never say that out loud.
Another thing you need to understand is you are not going to be going to the store to buy beef or chicken and make a separate meal from the rest of the family. I know no mother in Japan that would allow this to happen while a guest is in her home. You can get away with saying you are allergic to seafood, and the host family will adjust, but the mother is generally the king of the kitchen, and guests that stay in her home eat her food. How embarrassing for her would it be if the other host moms found out her guest was going out and eating on her own because she couldn't eat the food the mother presented? You need to look at things from her perspective, as you are the guest in her home.
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That is the FIRST post of this thread. If you read on, you'll see that I've heard many opinions already, and based on those opinions and those other ideas, I've developed my own thoughts. That's usually have thoughts and opinions develop. I now have my own opinion on the matter. You obviously know this because you have looked at the rest of the thread. You saw my response to another poster on this thread. Please don't feign ignorance to that point. No, I don't like your answer. I don't have to like every single thing you say - which is a good thing because believe me, I don't.
You don't see it as a 50-50 exchange. Good for you. That's YOU. This is me, making the choice to go to another country, making the choice to learn and teach at the same time. Don't try to make your opinion the gospel truth. Sorry to break it to you, but it isn't.
No, I'm not going to wear shoes in the house. I'm also not going to see a country of mostly housewives, and give up my desire to have a professional career. I'm also not going to see people eating crabs, and eat crab so that I can vomit my guts out all day and all night.
You see, MMM, you didn't give advice. You judge. The reason I react negatively to you is because you have the tone of the all mighty poster, the one who must know what is right and what is wrong - and by God, if someone disagrees with you, they must be wrong. It's condescending. It's also annoying. If you don't like me saying this to you, then I suggest you stop coming to every single thread I happen to post in.
Also, quick note: I didn't say "watching what they eat will make me sick." I said "... seeing that what they eat will make me eat." Seeing - as in BECAUSE what they eat will make me sick. If I'd meant "watching" I would've put a period in between the two phrases. At this point, I can't help but think that you're just looking for little things so that you can argue with me. That's also very annoying.
You don't know ANYTHING about the situation I'm in. The program I'm going to has asked its students what our diet is like. That's when I began to wonder if I should say that all seafood makes me sick or just shellfish. Now, I've decided to say that I can't eat any seafood for my own health. The program has designed the homestays so that, if my host family and I agree, I will cook and prepare my own meals so that I won't change their diet so drastically. You're still assuming that, because you know about Japan, you know about every single situation and every single Japanese experience. You don't, obviously. Perhaps you should try to understand that.