Quote:
Originally Posted by mercedesjin
I think I remember you talking about your wife before, and I said then that it's great to have a loving relationship - and I still believe that. It may sound corny, but love is a beautiful thing. But I AM curious. Why do you like her to be submissive to you?
I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty annoyed when you said what I've put in bold. Women's rights are not only getting women out of the kitchen, but stopping brutal attacks against women. Physical and verbal domestic abuse, rape, molestation - a lot of it stems from the idea that women are submissive, and the attackers want to feel stronger by attacking someone who is submissive.
Sorry if this seems inappropriate, but it's something I study in school, so I want to bring it up: a lot of modern day porn is a perfect example. Most of it is extremely derogatory towards women, making men powerful while women are turned into holes to attack - literally. Porn generally reflects the sexual ideals of a society - porn is what people fantasize about, right? That suggests that, in today's society, a lot of people just view women as holes - and bitches, whores, etc.
Then there's also economic oppression, with women who struggle financially because many still DO believe that women belong in the kitchen, not in the workplace.
I do agree with you about the 50-50 dynamic, though. If I ever marry a man, I would expect him to do chores - and I would help him, too. I would have a job, and I would expect him to have one too. If we had children, I would expect him to stay home certain days while I'm at work and I would stay home other days while he's out. It definitely needs to be a balance. But this brings me back to my question to you - if you believe this, then why do you still like having a woman submit to you?
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If you read what I wrote I said she is submissive by nature and I didn't say I wanted her to submit to me. Most Asian women are raised this way. I don't agree with that but that is just the way it is. If anything I am teaching her not to be submissive. By her being submissive she is happy when I show her I value her as my equal. She is also happy that I don't treat her like my piece of property. I am happy that we are able to compromise (I don't always get my way and that is fine by me). We do have a loving relationship because I am showing her that her upbringing isn't how life has to be and that I respect and love her enough to let her help me with our decisions in life.
As far as what I wrote that got you mad, I say who cares? I don't expect you to understand because: A. You are not a man dating American women, and B. You are not an American Woman. I have dated many women from all over and just don't like how American women act any more (my sister included). You can't have a 50-50 relationship if one is trying too hard to be equal. Granted women have been treated badly by alot of macho men, but there needs to be a happy medium where both partners treat each other with respect and realize they can't have their way always. By overcompensating alot of women have become downright bossy. This is not a good relationship. Marriage has become a gamble at best since the feminest movement started. Just look up when the divorce rate shot up. 1960's (start of the feminist movement) to the present and it's getting worse.My parents have a great relationship because neither trys to run the marriage.
Where does rape, porno, or anything else come into this? Porno is done by two slezy people accepting money to do those things(if anyone believes that the pizza deliveryman gets sex every time he delivers a pizza, they need serious help it's all a stupid fantasy written by a slezy person a man or woman). Rape is just violence that should be punished by death.These have nothing to do with a relationship.
I apoligize for nothing since I know I am not doing anything to be ashamed of. My opinion is based on years (yes, I am older than most here) of observation and experience.