Quote:
Originally Posted by Nyororin
I totally believe it can work, and that there are wonderful successes. But I don`t believe it is in the best interest of the child. That is different from saying it is impossible. There are great success stories out there. The thing is, having actual background in studying childhood development, it`s NOT in the best interest of the child. Can some children adjust and thrive? Of course. But it`s not the best situation, and never will be. For those single parents who ended up that way, I am entirely supportive of. I can`t say I feel the same for a single parent who knew ahead of time but still decides to have a child and have someone else raise it for them. If you do not have the time or ability to dedicate yourself to being the best possible parent to that child, it is selfish to choose to have one. That is the huge difference in my eyes. I don`t even think people with demanding jobs should choose to have pets who they have little time for, let alone children. It`s nothing wrong with their job, it`s that they are making the choice to bring a child into a situation that will never be in the best interest of that child.
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Why isn't it in the child's best interest, then?
The way I see it, it isn't selfish. Parents hire babysitters and let family members take care of their children all of the time. When I said, "take to grandmas," I meant for a few hours. I didn't mean for the child's life. In my experience, everyone does that.
I guess this is just another difference in opinions, but to me, having a child doesn't mean that the parent's life completely stops. Yes, a parent needs to sacrifice a lot to raise a child properly, but parents are human beings with life goals and ambitions also. I'm not saying that a parent should lock their kid up in the house while they go off to Las Vegas to party their life away, but if they have a set career in mind, why shouldn't that parent go for it?
What if sacrificing absolutely everything for the child makes the parent unhappy? Do you think that an unhappy, depressed parent is more fit to raise a child?