[jron]

Is this normal or did I just get unlucky.. Here's the story..

I met this J-girl (woman) online a little over a year ago.. She is seperated for 10 years now from her husband and has 2 kids and is 40. We got along great and it got pretty serious. I've been over to Japan 4 times in the last year and had her over here (USA) twice now. She wanted us to date no one else, and neither did I. We were boyfriend/girlfriend and wrote email every day and spoke on Skype almost every day as well.. This went on for over a year.. BUT.. Somehow the past 6 months she cooled.. I wasn't so worried but I had noticed a subtle difference.. Things were pretty great.

A couple of notes.. She has been from her husband for 10 years and claimed not to have been with any other man in that time.. I found that very strange but I wasn't going to argue with her. She also said she didn't like Japanese men and only wanted to be with a westerner. Again, neither of us was (supposedly) dating anyone else and she would get jealous if I talked of other women..

So she comes and visits this time.. I am sitting there as I watch her download images from her camera and her phone. No biggie.. SO the next morning she is out and I decide to look at the pictures.. Being assured in my min that there was nothing wrong as we shared everything that way..

Yup, you guessed it.. From the phone were some interesting pictures of her and some J dude in a hotel from the weekend before she came to visit me. There were pictures on the phone of that same dude dating back before I had met her. After that I check the mail, there is no password and what I find is email from ANOTHER dude, this time white, talking about hooking up at the hotel the night before visiting *me*.. Apparently her English teacher.. So, now including me.. She was with 3 different guys in 2 weekends.. wow.. busy girl!!!

So.. Is this normal? Can this kind of behavior be expected from most J girls or did I just pick a winner? I know that sexual mores are not thought of the same between America and Japan.. But this is kinda ridiculous.. The entire relationship was a pack of lies from beginning to end..

Do I try again? Or am I just walking a minefield by trying to find a Japanese woman to spend my life with..