[KyleGoetz]

Originally Posted by PaulK

Dear KyleGoetz,


Obviosuly you are very proficient in the language and have a lot of advice for those who want to learn. Why waste your time with me. Help others. Like I wrote, I appreciated the kind, non-judgmental responses of the first two members who replied to my post, you must have better things to do with your time.

Forgive me for giving you a solution ("talk to people").

Just for your information. I have not lived in Japan for 7 years consecutively. The last 5 were in the Middle East.

Sorry, but I must have misunderstood when you said "I am lived in Japan on and off for about 7 years"

But, I suppose you're also a fluent Arab speaker, so I have absolutely no excuses for not being fluent in Arabic and Japanese.

This is completely irrelevant and illogical—what was the purpose of this statement? I just don't understand what you spending 5 years in the ME has to do with me speaking Japanese and you speaking Japanese? If you lived in an Arabic-speaking country and cannot speak Arabic after five years, you are doing something wrong. Period. It is a matter of fact, not some put-down. You should get out and talk to people. It's foolproof. Absolutely foolproof. And yet you're here decrying my help. Sure I'm going to say it rudely: You have a Japanese wife you refuse to speak Japanese with. You are your own impediment. If you'd speak Japanese with her (not have her give you lessons, just have her talk and you try to talk back! This is how children learn, and they become natives!), you'd get better very quickly.

I am not working. Cannot find a job here in my humble corner of rural Japan. I guess that is another defect you could highlight and jump on me about.

Nope. You're just creating strawmen to try and divert attention away from my (likely apt) deduction that you're not speaking Japanese enough to learn it. You're in Japan. You've been there "off and on for 7 years." You are married to a Japanese citizen. The only possible explanation for why you don't speak Japanese at a very fluent level is either (1) motivational or (2) cerebral. I took the polite route and went with the first, which is lack of motivation. The alternative is that you literally have something wrong with the language center of your brain. I'm saying this academically, not to put you down. If you have something wrong with the language center of your brain, I feel sorry for you.

But I cannot possibly feel sorry for someone who (1) lives in Japan (2) and is married to a Japanese person, yet for 7 years has not progressed to a level to carry on a simple conversation! You are just plain doing it wrong, and when I tell you what to do, you create strawmen and try to make it seem like I'm just being rude! You are the one being rude. I give you help. You insult me and ignore my proffered help!

I am sure you're a great person and obviosuy very intelligent. What I would not give to able to speak Japanese like you, but the fact of the matter is, I can't.

Follow my advice and I guaranfriggintee you you will succeed. I did it. You can do it.