[SceptileMaster]

I've only read the first part and about half of the second half (I'll comment on the second part later) but I'm not entirely sure what's going on. The pace seems to be a bit back and forth also. For the moment I'll give some grammatical corrections.

[sat in her at her desk] should be just [sat at her desk].

]"I'm not here to capture you." he assured her.] Should be ["I'm not here to capture you," he assured her.]. With the comman instead of the period.

I think I noticed one or two other things but I can't remember them off the top of my head. Keep writing though, you're sure to keep getting better.