my heart was torn to pieces a few months ago.
i'm 17 years old and because of my strict family i've never been allowed to date. last summer i met a guy that was just a little younger than me but we were friends pretty quickly. eventually i fell for him, so imagine the joy i felt when he one day confessed feelings for me. so we went out for a while and i was so happy cuz it was my very first bf and the first time i was in love. then one day he sent me a message telling me that he cant be with me anymore and to never contact him again. at first i assumed that maybe his parents found out about me (his parents were both racist) so i didnt feel too bad but after a while he contacted me again and we started talking. of course i still had strong feelings for him but i pretty much wanted to die when he said "i didnt even really like you that much, i just felt sorry for you".
i cant remember how many months ago that was and he and i are friends now (i cant help it, im a forgiving person ^_^) but i still cry sometimes because what he said made me feel so pathetic. although i still have some strands of feeling for him, i dont want him back because i want to be with someone who loves me for real, not someone who simply pities me. and even if he did love me somewhat i need someone who is willing to work problems out with me, not just dump me and try to run away.
augh, i feel like such a luzer!
why did i let myself believe him this entire time?!