When it comes to apologies, I sort of like the Japanese side. I can apologize for something, and the apology is what matters. I don`t have to worry about going into an explanation of WHY or HOW - that isn`t the point. I`m not defending myself. I think it is something that takes time to get used to, as in the US it seems that an apology has to have an explanation in detail to try to get yourself out of the worst of trouble, deflect some of the blame, etc.
In Japan, I can just apologize and that be the end of it. Instead of feeling like I`m being put on trial and requiring a defense, I can apologize and have that apology mean either that I`m personally sorry, that it didn`t have anything to do with me but I`m still sorry it happened... Or anywhere in between and not have to explain that.
There are plenty of issues with gender things in Japan, and I`ve expressed my views on a lot of them in other places in the past so won`t get into any of it here... But I also actually attended a Japanese high school for a while, so may have a slightly different view of some of the classroom issues.
The seating arrangements are actually wonderful compromises. In general, girls and boys group themselves and do not associate with each other if not pushed to do so. Classroom projects usually involve working with the person next to you... So it is a pretty surefire way of getting girls and boys to actually participate equally and to associate with one another. If the seating pattern is entirely random, with no heed paid to the ratio between boys and girls, there will inevitably be a boy or girl isolated inside a group of the other. This also tends to be stressful. A random seating pattern also tends to lead to a higher probability of close knit friend groups being together and inevitably being talkative when they shouldn`t.
It really is a fairly decent compromise in my eyes. In school even in the US, the classroom tended to be split in a similar way when seats were set - maybe not in rows, but boy-girl-boy-girl alternations or table groups with an equal number of both. In Japan it more tended to be ordered by last name, and only split by gender when that style ended up with most girls and boys being grouped together.
A view from the other side in the US - when I was in school I expressed many times an interest in eventually getting married and having a family.
I have never had any teacher, male or female, be supportive of that. I was always told that it would be wasting my life, that I didn`t *really* want to do that, etc etc etc. The other side isn`t pretty either... When I finally did say I wanted to do something else, it was very easy to discourage me as it was a "dream" pulled out of nowhere to please everyone.
You never know what kind of background your student has - she may be rationalizing the fact that her family simply does not have enough money to send her on to the type of education she would need with "it would be too hard."... Something that was pretty common in my circle of high school friends, both male and female.
Food is all down to taste.
The roads... Well, I learned to drive in Japan, on Japanese roads. I find them normal and am pretty comfortable driving down those tiny urban and rural roads where it`s barely wider than the car.
I now find US roads terrifying, and the driving style absolutely violent... I suppose it all has to do with where you`re coming from and what you`re accustomed to.
No one is limited to tiny fans in summer - buy an air conditioner.
A lack of central air is not a lack of A/C.
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When it comes to things that specifically annoy me... Hmm... It is hard to come up with specific things that apply
only to Japan.
It think the easiest to come up with would be the fake interest in my life (well, the interest is real I assume, but the reasons behind it are falsified) people seem to have. It seems that everyone wants to be my friend and visit my house, but not
really out of a gesture of friendship but because it`s cool to have a non-Japanese friend and I`m convenient being as I speak Japanese... And who doesn`t want to see a real foreigner`s house?!?
It isn`t much of an issue these days as I`m not a very friendly person to begin with and am very private when it comes to my personal space, but was annoying for a bit until I made it quite clear that I had no interest in being friendly to satisfy anyone`s interests.
Another would be the assumption that everyone is inherently peaceful and naive... And how any view opposite this is sort of glossed over.
A few years back, my husband was pushed into a corner and volunteered for an interview on international relationships and world peace. (International as in the actual relationship between countries, not individuals.)
He stated that while the dream of world peace was a beautiful and noble ideal, as cultural and religious differences were always going to exist and be enhanced by community and varying levels of isolation, there was little hope of it ever being realized. Wars would always exist at some level, but it was our responsibility to try not to take sides.
In the published magazine, his comments were in whole until that last part - where they cut it off and made him say "World peace is beautiful and noble"... This sort of thing seems to the norm, and is reflected everywhere you look with the representations of Japan being a society entirely devoted to being global citizens that don`t believe in conflict of any sort. And I think this ends up making Japan appear childish when viewed from the outside as the world is not so simple.
LL size women`s shoes are lucky to be 25 cm. They`re usually "24.5 but we think 25 might be able to squeeze into them!" - and most places only stock M at that (23cm). I have never been able to buy a pair of shoes in an actual store as I wear 25.5/26cm.
The fact that everyone just takes it for granted that during the major holidays it is going to be incredibly painfully crowded - and still all crowd the same places as that is what is expected on a holiday. When it comes to what matters on a holiday, actual enjoyment is pretty far down on the list... Which of course makes it impossible for anyone to enjoy something as places are so crowded with people who are just going through the motions out of holiday obligation or something. As shocking as it is to most people we tell, my husband actually
volunteers to work over major holidays so that we can have days off when everyone else is not. It is rare for anyone to get the point in this. "But, it`s a holiday! I can`t believe he is working on a holiday! How will you ever make Family Memories(TM)?" Umm, a couple weeks later when we don`t have to fight with thousands of other people?
I`m sure there are more, but I didn`t really plan out this reply.