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Originally Posted by noodle
I think all of you are generalising here! First of all, I'm going to assume that apologising in the US is the same as the UK, in which case, people don't always make excuses when they apologise! Secondly, I think it's a terrible idea to prefer just an apology ALL THE TIME instead of getting an explanation! The perpetrator can get away with so much if all it took was an apology to get someone off their back! With that said, sometimes, in certain situations, I do agree that an apology would be better than an explanation!
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Of course using an apology to get off all the time is silly, just as never giving an explanation. That isn`t the case in Japan, and I don`t believe that anyone has said it is. If you repeat the same thing, then of course you`re going to fall under some serious scrutiny as by apologizing, you are basically saying you won`t do the same thing again. (Plus, there are things that a mere apology don`t make up for - but that isn`t what is being talked about here.)
As the one being apologized to you can ask for an explanation. I think this is a key difference.
From my exposure to people from the UK, I would say that the culture when it comes to apologies isn`t quite the same as that of the US. In the US, it really does seem to be the norm to deflect blame at all costs. Excuses seem to come out first before any expression of regret or guilt - sometimes even leading to the other person getting mad and snappy about having to take responsibility for their own wrongdoing.
Of course, not
everyone is like this, and it would be silly to think that they are. But it is common enough to be a pretty accurate generalization.
In my experience, in Japan apology comes first. An explanation follows if the person in the wrong is asked for one. In the US, an explanation or excuse comes first, and then possibly an apology if the person feels they are enough in the wrong as to not divert the blame.
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On a side note, can I ask why the Americans make such a huge deal over air-conditioning? Here in the UK our climate/weather is pretty similar in tempreture to Japan (or so I've read). We use central heating in winter, but I've never known a single English person to use air-conditioning, not even in many places of work, and we all survive fine. I find it hard to believe living in Japan is so much more difficult without air-conditioning, or is it simply a matter of beng used to luxuries and then enduring shock when that luxury is taken away from you as you move abroad?
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I am under the impression that the UK is
much cooler than Japan. Where I live, in the summer it is almost always over 30C, occasionally even approaching 40C (rare, but still)... And I live pretty much in the middle in terms of north to south.