[MMM]

I think you are mixing up the uses of "I'm sorry".

"I'm sorry about your father's death" is not an apology for any action the speaker did (assuming, of course, he didn't cause the father's death).

That is very different from "I apologize for your father's death" which is an admission of guilt.

So saying "I'm sorry" is showing remorse, but is not necessarily an admission of guilt.

However, an admission of guilt without any remorse is not an apology.

"I was late. So what?" is an admission of guilt without showing remorse.

I think you can show admission of guilt and show remorse in a mistake you made by apologizing and saying "I'm sorry."

As for the military comparison, I don't think I am hung up on it, I am just saying it appears they do things differently than the civilian world, which might help explain your perspective that the non-military members here do not share.

As an adult, I would not take your action plan to help ensure I am not tardy again as condescending. Supervisor or not, I would not take it as showing me care or respect. I would call it demeaning. They may do this in the military, and maybe it is because they can, but I don't think this would work in the working world unless it was something I thought I needed your help with.