[Nyororin]

The bed thing tends to be more about different life patterns and children, rather than any matching issues. When small children usually sleep with the mother, dad coming home late and getting into bed can wake everyone up... And even if there aren`t children and the everyone comes home early - it can mean better sleep for everyone. They can go to sleep when they feel tired and not worry about being woken up by, or waking up, the other.
Plus, I`ve noticed that there is a bit of "if we don`t sleep together every night, when we do it`s something special" feel to it - which isn`t really a bad thing.

I also have never really slept well in the same bed with someone else. I always feel overly warm no matter the season, and wake up pretty frequently. I also like to sleep in a position that doesn`t usually work too well with another person next to me - so it was pretty common to have to spend quite some time just trying to find a relaxing and comfortable position with the part of the bed available to me. Back when we shared the same bed, my husband and I used different blankets with the same futon. When we bought beds, instead of a single big bed, we bought two (a single and a semi-double) and now sleep in different beds (both in the same room).

My husband could sleep anywhere, in any position. He would be just as happy with us in the same bed. But I`m a lighter sleeper so I get much better sleep.

I love and adore my husband, but that certainly doesn`t overcome physical discomfort that simply isn`t necessary at all... especially at night, every night, when sleeping.

I kind of wonder why there is such a strong tendency for separate beds to be thought of as something bad in the west... And why it seems to be connected to a lack of love in the relationship. Even Steven makes and assumption along these lines with the "matched" bit. Applying the norms of western culture to it doesn`t really make much sense, as it`s pretty normal to sleep in separate beds so there is no stigma. There is no extra meaning to it - it doesn`t hint at a couple that isn`t happy, or that don`t love each other.