[Jusa]

I have two long-distance relationships behind me. One was about two years the other was about four years. Both of them lived in the states, while I'm from Scandinavia. I never met the first one but I met the second one three times. She came here once for about a month and I went there twice; 3 months both visits.

I was 16 when I met the first and 22 when I met the second one. Phone calls, internet and snail mail as contact methods.

If you ask me which is more realistic? Face to face dating, without a doubt.

Talking on the phone and voice + webcam is a good way to deal with being apart, while it also makes it harder at the same time. But those are essential in actually learning to know about each other. Just typing online isn't gonna give you a full idea of who the person is and what they are like.

Sure you get to know things you might not ever learn if you met them face to face instead of online. But there's a good chance the person you met online isn't going to be anything like what they are on the inside while they TYPE. The second girl I dated was pretty close to polar opposites online vs. real life. Even phone vs. real life was clearly very different when it came to her. We might have been compatible online but we weren't compatible at all in real life.

I'd say meeting them as soon as possible is what should be done before you get in too deep, it can get messy.

Also there's a difference between needing someone in your life versus becoming dependent on someone's existence to ponder about (for many reasons e.g. because they get me and understand me like no other ever has; because it feels like we're soul mates; because there possibly can't be anyone else who loves me as much; because they relate to me so well).