[Kokugen]

Well after months of not writing I decided I'd come back with a vengeance and have started work on a NaruSaku fanfic. I've only got the prolouge atm and I'm working through the first chapter now, I'd really like if I could get some criticism on this as I am forever trying to improve. So without further ado:

Prologue chapter : A Silent Goodbye

“Naruto…”

The sky was clear the setting sun lighting the scene, Sakura stood at the entrance of Konoha village, her shoulders shock slightly and her voice was cracked when she pronounced the last syllable,

“Sakura-chan… I… why did you come?”

He had his back to Sakura and his voice had an air of indifference, his shoulders were tense and stiff as were his legs also there seemed to be something forced in the way he spoke,

“Naruto you - you – baka!”

Her face was creased with pain and her eyelids tightened to try and hold back tears, her eyes glistened with moisture that slowly made it’s way down her face reaching her chin. It hovered there for a moment before falling to the ground an emotion crystallised,

“Sakura-chan… how did you… hah… Gomen na sai.”

Naruto had turned around when he heard Sakura sniff and as he expected she was crying, one of the few things in this world Naruto couldn’t handle. Naruto stuttered when he spoke and he turned round and faced her fully, his face was forlorn and his eyes had lost their azure glow. He lifted his hand as if to comfort her but allowed it to fall to his side,

“Naruto you didn’t plan - hic - on telling me, did you expect me not to find out?”

Naruto’s head dropped and a frown appeared on his face, he took a step closer to her and felt her short, choked breathing upon his chest, a wave of regret flowed through his body and a flood of memories filled his mind, he looked down at Sakura’s face her sorrowful eyes and shattered disposition and wondered whether what he was doing was right,

“Sakura-chan, if I had another chance then perhaps things wouldn’t have turned out this way but, as things are this can’t work.”

Sakura seemed overwhelmed by the speed at which events had gone and was struggling to sort her feelings out but there was one feeling which was clear and that was that she didn’t want Naruto to leave, she stumbled forward into Naruto and wept into his shirt, gripping it with both hands. She looked up at him his face had a sombre smile that calmed her despite knowing what it truly meant,

“So that’s it you give up! There’s no way of fixing this! What happened to your way of the ninja! What happened to never going back on your word! What about that Naruto!?”

Naruto did not keel back from her attack, he knew too well he deserved it but no amount of training could have prepared him for this moment, a pain in his chest had been building from when he heard her begin to speak and he could not help but let the emotions he had been holding back show on his face, his eyebrows lowered and his eyes became hollow, she was telling the truth and he had once again broken a promise to her. Perhaps this feeling was still there from the first time he broke a promise - the promise of a lifetime he made for her and it was now surfacing in the light of him doing it once again,

“Sakura-chan -”

“I told you to call me Sakura!”

“Sakura-chan, all hope in Konoha lies in me if I don’t do this then it’s the end for everyone, even you and me. No matter how much my heart, my soul or even you tell me to come back my mind knows I can’t.”



Sakura sobbed into his chest again before she felt his hand on her chin, his touch ran though her body like a current of electricity freezing all her movements even her tears and demanding the attention of all her senses, she could feel the softness of his fingers on her chin and could smell his unique sent which was now so melancholic, his breathing was light on her forehead and she could hear that it was clear with no hesitation.

When he lifted her chin she saw he had a smile on his face that this time was genuine,

“Naruto…”

Naruto could feel all the emotions he had tried to seal away as he left slowly breaking loose and with them his old worries and insecurities came but then he felt he could end everything, the relationship, the problems and this encounter if he could kiss her just this once,

“Just this once forgive me…”

Naruto leant forwards whilst slowly lifting Sakura’s chin, Sakura closed her eyes and felt his lips slowly press upon hers, Sakura felt the feelings of joy and relief melt through her heart and throughout her body, He’s staying, he’s not gonna leave me alone. Naruto lifted his lips and moved them towards her ear,

“Sakura always remember that I love you and will forever.”

“What do you mea -”

There was a sudden rush of wind which forced Sakura to keep her eyes closed and she felt the weight of Naruto disappear from in front of her, when the wind subsided she feared opening her eyes the image of Naruto in front of her still there, she forced her eyes open and saw that there was no-one there.

She fell to her knees and stared into the distance the sun at it’s final phase slowly set before her, leaving her in darkness she knelt there sobbing for an unknown time before a fellow medical ninja came past and discovered her there, Sakura allowed the woman to carry her away but she didn’t here a word she spoke, all that was in her mind was the realisation that Naruto left and she was once again, alone.

And that's all I got constructive, crticism welcome.