Quote:
Originally Posted by Supperman
Thanks, dogsbody70, for taking care of this!
I can feel it becomes so much better, because it is concise, natural, and much clearer.
It is a clear sunny day in the mountains; A young child is skiing on snow covered slopes. She is accompanied by the A man and woman, who are also skiing and carefully watching her.
Her outfits are( HER OUTFIT IS very colorful and appealing. (She is wearing a colourful outfit which includes: a light-blue jacket, red pants with a black stripe on each side, blue gloves and shoes, a white muffler (or maybe collar), orange ski glasses, a dark blue cap, and she is holding pink ski sticks, Her ski's also are pink.. |
Also maybe mention the weather in the first paragaph rather than at the end.