Lol, yes the only thing the online translators are really good for is giving the definition of a single word. Start putting full sentences in the translators and you get blah blah blah...

I have a pretty good feeling that he is going to turn down my offer.

Exactly. We can put a man on the moon, but I don't expect to see a good machine translation happening in my lifetime.

Check, probably. Or Paypal.

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To be completely honest with you, I couldn't see anyone translating something like that for free, unless said translator is doing so as a side project for his/her own personal use. I know of translators, and they don't do this stuff for free.

I do know of one translator that's done some translations (but she's a part of the fandom and was just sharing it), but she's doing so in her own time and at her own pace. She hasn't updated one of her translations in months due to "real life", but I'm sure that if it was a paid job, she'd take it much more seriously.

Seriously, you're requesting way too much.

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Actually it's a novel, and she was translating it for fans, but she hasn't done much in months since real life got in the way. We didn't even know of its existence until she mentioned how much she enjoyed reading it.

Either way, you are requesting too much, imo.