Well to each there own, but she isn't alone in that way of thinking...

And tell me this... if it isn't derogatory, why do kids use it as a way of picking on others at school who are not 100% Japanese?

It's not supposed to be derogatory. But kids can be cruel. A kid can make anything an insult.

The experience I've had with it is that it's a term to identify a forginer. I can be derogatory or not. Depending on the situation, person, anything.

It goes back to the old saying "It isn't what you say, It's how you say it"

Well, this is true I guess... suppose anything can be offensive in context

Suppose you do convince people to stop saying "gaijin". Now what? What word do they use to talk about foreigners? Because that IS the word for foreigner.

I've heard people say the word "gaikokujin" is offensive. So now we need to get rid of that word to?

You know, even the word "foreigner" in English can be used in an offensive manner. "We don't want any of you foreigners in our town!" for example.

On the subject of kids using it to pick out others - kids of any nationality will pick out something different in another kid. They'll pick out the non-Japanese, the Japanese, the fat, the freckled, the redhead, the smart... Its just something they do.
Adults aren't any different.

Its also subjective to the "victim", my buddy Dave doesn't care if he is called a Gaijin or "Gwailo" (Cantonese for Foreigner). I think the term "racism" is being abused these days, people who take certain word offensively may be discriminating themselves in the first place. I have friends that think "Chinese Guy" is a racist term, while I tell my friend to address me as the little Chinese Guy....

Its the same concept with people who victimize themselves, in this case, the individual is even more reactive to how they are address because they themselves think that they stand out different form the crowd

A random insult at my mother? That affects me alot more personally than a Japanese person hearing a word that translates to "foreigner". If you don't see that then, well, no point for me to talk to you.

Of course it affects you, that isn't the point - the point is that my girlfriend doesn't like to hear people who stay in her country being spoken of in that manner. Much the same as you wouldn't like to hear anyone speaking ill of a family member

I don't like hearing Americans use the word 'Jap' but they say it quite a lot out here...are you saying I'm not allowed to be offended because I'm English?

Gaikokujin is never used in a negative sense though...

Also, doesn't it seem strange that no media publications or broadcasts EVER use the word 'gaijin'?

Much in how any media outlet will avoid using words that some groups have taken upon themselves to think is offensive.

They want to keep their sales up, not drive away those who are easily offended.

Gaijin is just one of those words that people have, for no good reason, decided they will be angry and offended when they hear it. It's a ridiculous issue.

I find your assumptions regarding who can, or should be, offended by derogatory name calling both ignorant and offensive. Anyone within hearing distance of the use of a racial epithet should be angry at the person using it, regardless of their own race. Your thinking is how such terms manage to remain in use.:mad: