If you feel you want to marry a Japanese lady, go for it. I thought I would never get to meet a Japanese lady so I settled for a American lady. Boy was I sorry. After my divorce I moved to Japan and met many nice Japanese ladies and married my wife.
Most of your problem is self confidence. You must be confident to impress Japanese women. Japanese men are too shy and they like confidence.
Being black means nothing. Not all women like black men, but not all women like white, Mexican, Polish, etc...... The only problem you might run into is if her parents don't want you to marry her and she won't date you if she is sure this will happen. A black friend of mine is married to a Japanese lady here and in Japan, one of the best "ladies man" I knew was black. So don't use this as an excuse to chicken out.
Follow your dream, it usually is right.:ywave:

Marriage is not necessary love. I was merely pointing out that love is not based on ethnicity. If you fall in love with a black chick, you would certainly last long enough. But let's not go further, since this is not helpful to the thread at all.

If that is the way you feel I say go for it man, but do not close yourself off to other great possibilities you may run into on the way. Also, you may find that dating with and being married to a Japanese women has a lot more, or different stresses than you may have being married to someone from your own country. Remember the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.

I would say the internet is your best bet then. Japanese-Western dating sites are all over the place. My only other suggestion would be for you to come to Japan for work, or as a student. Your chances will increase greatly by default, and you will get a much better sense if this kind of thing is as desirable as you feel it is now.


Umm, I hardly think that is true. You have been misinformed.

Love knows no race, and if you begin choosing from a certain race you are probably not going to pay attention to more important considerations.

Getting a Japanese girlfriend is about as easy as falling down. But, finding one whom you love and who loves you back is much more difficult.

I'm sorry to say that most western men I know who are in relationships with Japanese women are not happy. Men tend to marry for love or sex, Japanese women often marry for the sake of being married, and have less of an emotional attachment. I've heard so many times from acquaintances who are married to Japanese women about how unhappy they are in their relationships, the absence of sex, and other issues.

The foremost thing you should be looking for in a partner is mutual love, not race.

You're right, that happens. Sometimes.
You're leaving out half of the story, which I don't think is very fair.

Saying: "Japanese women often marry for the sake of being married, and have less of an emotional attachment."

Is an extremely blind assumption in my opinion.
Japanese or not, women don't just go around marrying for no reason.

You're making it seem like Japanese woman are a loveless people that go out and marry people they met ten minutes ago.

I'd say, quite the contrary.

I'd strongly disagree with this.
Finding a Japanese woman that loves you is just as hard as finding a woman of ANY race that loves you.

Why do you think so?

My Japanese fiance and I are madly in love.
But then again, maybe she's having an online/in person relationship with someone from another hemisphere for the past 4 years, spending thousands of dollars to visit me every year, maybe that's not deep? Maybe she's doing it for the sake of "being in a relationship?"

Maybe my Japanese fiancee's sister is married to an Australian man for the past 17 years "just to be in a relationship." And maybe her daughter is a product of "just being in a relationship."

And maybe my best friend's Japanese girlfriend is in a relationship just for the sake of it. And maybe bELyVIS's wife is in it for just for the sake of "being in a relationship." Maybe my Japanese lady friend Kumi is engaged to a man from France for "the sake of being in a relationship."

I'm not one to shut down another person's opinions, but frankly the opinions I've been reading in this thread are just ridiculously stupid and not to mention, very far from reality, down right absurd. Especially that of Ronin4hire and Sangetsu. If you asked me, they are the one's living in a fantasy world.

Seems to me like Ronin4hire and Sangetsu think Japan is a loveless nation.

Take the following scenario:
You're attracted to Japanese females.

You're at a bar. You see two females, both alone. One is Japanese, and one is Black.
Which one are you going to start a conversation with? Easy, the Japanese.
Then, you start a relationship with the Japanese female.
You won't start a relationship with the black female because you are not attracted to black women.

Have you ever been in a relationship? Not third grade puppy love, but an actual relationship?

What you're looking for is what you'll look for. I don't think you, or anyone else is in any place to tell anyone "what they should be looking for."

Who's arguing? It's called a debate. It's what people do on forums.
No one's asking for your immature comments, and no one's making you post here if you don't like it.

I think what is trying to be said is that you shouldn`t expect a deep relationship when you are going out with someone just because of their race/nationality - and they are going out with you because of yours. Once the novelty wears off chances are there won`t be anything left to hold the relationship together.

There are a LOT of guys in Japan dating Japanese girls because they have an Asian fetish. And the majority of girls who date them do so because they have a foreigner fetish. When that is all there is to the relationship, things usually don`t last all that long - and if one side really has fallen in love but the other hasn`t... Things end very badly.

Normal relationships exist, but the thing is... They tend to be the exception. And most of them are founded on friendship then love instead of a racial fetish.

It would have stayed here if he hadn`t dropped to poorly veiled personal insults.

Yes.
This is a healthy debate, that I would like to continue!
Let's keep it at least 10th grade because I am enjoying this discussion.