Graduation Gift Ideas?

[Sashimister]

My old professor's granddaughter (American) is graduating from college soon and I'm thinking of sending her a graduation gift from Tokyo. I haven't even met her in person before but we have been corresponding with each other as she is deeply interested in Japanese culture. We have also been exchanging small gifts.

On this occasion, I would like to send her something better than Pocky's and kanji tee-shirts. However, I've already come to a deadlock. I have no idea what would please a young American lady. I'm thinking of spending 10,000 - 20,000 yen, shipping excluded.

What would you like to receive from a Japanese uncle figure? Would it be okay if I actually asked her?

Any suggestions will be appreciated.

[MMM]

Originally Posted by Sashimister

My old professor's granddaughter (American) is graduating from college soon and I'm thinking of sending her a graduation gift from Tokyo. I haven't even met her in person before but we have been corresponding with each other as she is deeply interested in Japanese culture. We have also been exchanging small gifts.

On this occasion, I would like to send her something better than Pocky's and kanji tee-shirts. However, I've already come to a deadlock. I have no idea what would please a young American lady. I'm thinking of spending 10,000 - 20,000 yen, shipping excluded.

What would you like to receive from a Japanese uncle figure? Would it be okay if I actually asked her?

Any suggestions will be appreciated.

That size of a gift will rival maybe even her own parents. I think 5000 yen is more than enough for non-family and someone you have never met...though obviously you will be the best judge.

[Sashimister]

Originally Posted by MMM

That size of a gift will rival maybe even her own parents. I think 5000 yen is more than enough for non-family and someone you have never met...though obviously you will be the best judge.

That is a good piece of information, MMM, because I was originally going to say 20,000 - 30,000 yen!

[MMM]

Originally Posted by Sashimister

That is a good piece of information, MMM, because I was originally going to say 20,000 - 30,000 yen!

Even for my best friend's and sister's wedding I spent less than 100 dollars on the gifts.

American gift culture and Japanese gift culture are very different. There are regional differences, of course, as well as familial ones... but if a man I didn't know spent that much on me for college graduation, I would feel very indebted.

I think the only person that bought me a graduation present was my dad. Other than that, it is not expected, I think. Especially from a non-family member. So whatever you choose will be more than most people give her.

[Sashimister]

Originally Posted by MMM

Even for my best friend's and sister's wedding I spent less than 100 dollars on the gifts.

American gift culture and Japanese gift culture are very different. There are regional differences, of course, as well as familial ones... but if a man I didn't know spent that much on me for college graduation, I would feel very indebted.

I think the only person that bought me a graduation present was my dad. Other than that, it is not expected, I think. Especially from a non-family member. So whatever you choose will be more than most people give her.

Thanks for the great explanation. I'm quickly leaning towards the 5,000-yen range.

I'm not even known as an incredibly generous gift-giver over here, but I guess I would look like one over there. Making her feel indebted is the last thing I want to do. I was getting ready to go and look in Takashimaya or Isetan, but now I'll probably opt to check Don Quijote first.

[MMM]

Originally Posted by Sashimister

Thanks for the great explanation. I'm quickly leaning towards the 5,000-yen range.

I'm not even known as an incredibly generous gift-giver over here, but I guess I would look like one over there. Making her feel indebted is the last thing I want to do. I was getting ready to go and look in Takashimaya or Isetan, but now I'll probably opt to check Don Quijote first.

Ha ha! You can do better than Don Quijote, but I will be honest, it is hard for me to think of what a @23 year old woman would be interested in.

I have been to a couple weddings in Japan in the last few years, (and am anticipating a couple more) and for me the sheer volume of gift giving is brutal. I understand the meaning of 結婚貧乏 (is that the right term?)

I have hosted several exchange trips between high school-age students and elementary school-age students to Japan. Usually the Japanese kids would come in winter, then we would go visit in summer. Without fail the host parents in Japan would spend hundreds of dollars on gifts for the students and their families even though the American families sent comparatively paltry gifts with the Japanese students home. This often led to desperate phone calls to me: "They bought my son a Nintendo DS and all we gave them was a block of cheese. What do we do?!?"

[RickOShay]

I would like to interject and say I too agree with the lower cash amount. Right now the only people I feel it is appropriate to spend 20,000-30,000 on is my parents and my girlfriend. 5000-10,000 would be more than generous of you. But of course like MMM said you be the judge. Considering it is for college graduation it may in fact be ok, depending upon your relationship with her and her grandfather.

[berrypie]

This is always a tough task for guys and you guys never really know what we ladies want! LOL (just joking)

Since that young lady is greatly interested in Japanese culture, how about some Japanese handcrafted / Japanese style accessory (necklace, bracelet, earrings, brooch... etc)?

[Sashimister]

Originally Posted by MMM

I have been to a couple weddings in Japan in the last few years, (and am anticipating a couple more) and for me the sheer volume of gift giving is brutal. I understand the meaning of 結婚貧乏 (is that the right term?)

結婚貧乏 means having to live a simpler, more frugal life after getting married. It's said of a woman who worked and lived not so frugally until she got married.

The term you are probably looking for is ご祝儀貧乏, meaning spending so much cash for weddings and funerals.

I have hosted several exchange trips between high school-age students and elementary school-age students to Japan. Usually the Japanese kids would come in winter, then we would go visit in summer. Without fail the host parents in Japan would spend hundreds of dollars on gifts for the students and their families even though the American families sent comparatively paltry gifts with the Japanese students home. This often led to desperate phone calls to me: "They bought my son a Nintendo DS and all we gave them was a block of cheese. What do we do?!?"

This is so funny and I can see it still happening 1,000 years from now. You should write a book someday. I'll buy a few copies at Kinokuniya.

[MMM]

Originally Posted by Sashimister

結婚貧乏 means having to live a simpler, more frugal life after getting married. It's said of a woman who worked and lived not so frugally until she got married.

The term you are probably looking for is ご祝儀貧乏, meaning spending so much cash for weddings and funerals.



This is so funny and I can see it still happening 1,000 years from now. You should write a book someday. I'll buy a few copies at Kinokuniya.

Thank you for the correction. One of my good friends in Japan who is of marrying age had to stop going to weddings of her friends, on fear of ご祝儀貧乏.