Xenophobic Japan?

[MMM]

Originally Posted by Mattleninja

XD I would never teach English, ever. I'm actually planning on going there with my degree in Psychology to work in that kind of field, unless being a popstar or something gets in the way

And I forgot to mention that I am studying Japanese (I've been studying for about 15 weeks now, I know all my hiragana and katakana *dances*) so come two or three years down the line I should be alright I figure. Additonally I plan on taking a 'placement year' in Japan to get a feel for it before I really decide on whether it's the kind of place I'd like to live.

Again thanks for the helpful replies.

Just out of curiousity, what do you plan to do that "placement year" if you aren't going to be teaching English?

[MMM]

Originally Posted by kireikoori

I hate it when people put Japanese girls into a box. I mean, they're just like any other girls. :/

I do agree with you. I will make two statements, though, of things I observed.

Many the Japanese women I knew were told by their dads to stay clear of gaijin. The ones that dated black guys were told by their parents to specifically stay clear of black guys.

These "gullible" women may have been ditched by their gaijin boyfriends, but after how many dinners, presents, hotel stays, etc. paid for by the "jerk"? Japanese guys should treat their women better. Like it was said, even ugly gaijin can land a gal...she's not after his good looks...

[noodle]

Originally Posted by chachava

tbh, that is the fault of Japanese girls - they are gullable to the point of lunacy and it's no wonder many (most?) gaijin go on a sex-fuelled rampage when they hit Japan

TBH, i have to agree with you from the experiences i've had helping out young japanese women here!... They just don't seem that "experienced" when it comes to the relationship side of things or anything between boys that isn't stricly friendship... Unfortunately, i've seen 7/9 japanese girls that have been on an exchange to here being played by a french/spanish boy.

[chachava]

Originally Posted by kireikoori

I hate it when people put Japanese girls into a box. I mean, they're just like any other girls. :/

Not really, a lot of the girls I have met have been marriage-obsessed to the point it becomes strange...

This is why I think they are so open to being 'used and abused'. Like I said though, this is just my own viewpoint - I didn't say it was fact and I didn't say it was every girl so wasn't putting them 'into a box' by any means

[kireikoori]

Originally Posted by MMM

I do agree with you. I will make two statements, though, of things I observed.

Many the Japanese women I knew were told by their dads to stay clear of gaijin. The ones that dated black guys were told by their parents to specifically stay clear of black guys.

And this is coming from from a guy who usually argues AGAINST Japan's xenophobic reputation... :/

The black guy statement you made is weird. If made me feel good that I stand a chance against against a black guy, yet feel guilty about feeling good about that Cuz now I feel sorry for black guys. xD

Oh hey now come on. Every country has xenophobic parents. I mean look at all the foreign guys with Japanese girlfriends. Marty Friedman's ex was Japanese, Thane Camus is apparently in his relationship with his Japanese girl...umm...seriously there's loads of them. So it can't be impossible or anything.

Because I swear all this "Japanese girls prefer not to date gaijin" is making me sort of scared to ask a Japanese girl out, against all logic.

[Ronin4hire]

Originally Posted by kireikoori

Because I swear all this "Japanese girls prefer not to date gaijin" is making me sort of scared to ask a Japanese girl out, against all logic.

C'mon dude... that is pretty stupid

If you like a girl you ask her out.

If she says no then she says no.

If she says no solely because of race then she's messed up.

Who wants to date messed up women?

[MMM]

Originally Posted by kireikoori

And this is coming from from a guy who usually argues AGAINST Japan's xenophobic reputation... :/

The black guy statement you made is weird. If made me feel good that I stand a chance against against a black guy, yet feel guilty about feeling good about that Cuz now I feel sorry for black guys. xD

Oh hey now come on. Every country has xenophobic parents. I mean look at all the foreign guys with Japanese girlfriends. Marty Friedman's ex was Japanese, Thane Camus is apparently in his relationship with his Japanese girl...umm...seriously there's loads of them. So it can't be impossible or anything.

Because I swear all this "Japanese girls prefer not to date gaijin" is making me sort of scared to ask a Japanese girl out, against all logic.

Read what I said. I didn't say MOST parents tell their daughters not to date foreigners. I said that many of the girls I knew that dated foreigners were told by their parents not to. It's the "forbidden fruit" theory.

In the US you must be 21 to drink beer, and have a valid ID to buy it. In Japan beer is sold in vending machines. Which country do you think has a bigger problem with teen alcholism? (Hint: It's not Japan). Why? Once you tell someone they can't have something, what's the first thing they do?

Are you sure you understood what I said about black boyfriends. It's the same, forbidden fruit, thing. Dad says "Stay clear of black guys!" So what happens? Daughter goes straight to Roppongi gaijin bars. If dad had just kept his mouth shut, his daughter wouldn't be dating a dude from Kenya.

Who said it was difficult to land a Japanse girlfriend?
No one said "Japanese girls prefer not to date gaijin" did they? I sure didn't.

Of course there are some girls that prefer Japanese men to foreigners, but these kind of women don't go to gaijin bars and take English classes.

[kireikoori]

I want to actually get along with my girlfriends parents a little bit.

I'm not exactly comfortable with being the whole forbidden fruit thing. I don't look at Japanese girls that way. But I guess some chance is better than none, I guess.

[MMM]

Originally Posted by kireikoori

I want to actually get along with my girlfriends parents a little bit.

I'm not exactly comfortable with being the whole forbidden fruit thing. I don't look at Japanese girls that way. But I guess some chance is better than none, I guess.

Not all girls...I just said "many" I met. Probably not even most of them.
If it makes you feel better, I met many of my female friends parents, and they always welcomed me into thier homes and were very generous. Japanese families are very close (not all of them, but many of the ones I knew were), partially it's just from living together in tight quarters. You can't really go to someone's house to visit and NOT be hanging out with the parents, as there is no "den" or "family room" for people to escape to. The kitchen and living room are usually attached, and that's where everyone hangs out.

[Mattleninja]

Originally Posted by MMM

Just out of curiousity, what do you plan to do that "placement year" if you aren't going to be teaching English?

I want to do either a study year in University (continuing with my current degree, which is Psychology with Sociology Bsc). Or possibly a working year, again in an area under the umbrella of psychology.

I don't know the situation in Japan for these things, but I am determined to get there one way or another. Luckily my Japanese teacher has had students go to Japan for placement years before (albeit I don't know what degree programme they were on).

If I can't get into Japan my backup plan is that I'm studying Mandarin Chinese in my spare time, so China or Taiwan are my backups.

EDIT: Why is everyone arguing about Japanese women? Surely they're not so different to women everywhere else as to not date certain people and date others etc? I think you're all arguing over something particularly pointless and not relevant to the thread.