Child Care

[Nyororin]

Originally Posted by Kanji_The_Wanderer

Why is having a baby sitter unheard of?

So a mother has to stay home until the child is old enough for schooling? What about another older kid in the family watching the child while the mother worked? Or what about the father?

What I mean by a babysitter being unheard of is... Well, when you think of babysitter, usually it`s someone coming to your house and watching your kids while you`re out.
That doesn`t happen in Japan. Or at least it`s EXTREMELY rare. If your child is being cared for, it`s at the health center or a school. Not in your home.

As for an older kid watching the little kids, it usually doesn`t happen. Older children need to study, etc, and unless there is a strange situation (like a single parent, which is not common here) it doesn`t really happen.

Since when was the father watching his own kids considered a "babysitter"!?!?!

The mother doesn`t HAVE to stay home until her children are school aged. She could put them into the health center licensed town nursery school (usually from 3 months of age).
Most mothers DON`T by *choice*.

[fuu]

It is possible to have care at 3 months of age in the nursery schools. Amazing. I didn't need care then because I was at home and studying but the local daycare here will only except up to 3 children in diapers. I have no idae why but that is their rule. I have never sent my kids to daycare but there is a program here called The Toy Bus. When they were younger I would take them once a week to the Recreation centre and a big blue bus would pull up full of toys and books. The Kids then would pick three toys and a few books and go inside to play with them with the other children. They could take these toys and books home for the week. I was sort of like a library of toys. Are there programs like this? Or any Mom and tot programs for socializing with your babies and toddlers?

[yamashita]

Originally Posted by Nyororin

Since when was the father watching his own kids considered a "babysitter"!?!?!

in germany its normal that working fathers sometimes do watch for their kids considered a babysitter.
when mothers I know want to go out for a glass wine with me or other friends, the father watches at the child.
also the mothers are watching at their kids if the father wants to go out for a beer with friends. thats normal here..
thats equality.
mothers are going to work and fathers are going to work.
the father cooks food or the mother cooks it.
I know its different in japan. thats o.k. but a bit strange for european persons.
escpacially in france its normal that mothers go to work.
in germany its a big debate at the moment cause some politicians say that if german mothers would work they would be bad mothers...and thats not true! german mothers go to work. before a few days I met a mother who goes to work since her son was 2 months old. the fatehr is watching for the baby and she makes the money because she has got a very good job...

anyway-children like to be together with other childrens for playing with them at young age. they learn new things from them as well..

[fuu]

I know the school year in Japan is different then it is here but what about child care juring school breaks?
Here the children have two months off in the summer but I still have to work so I have to arrange child care. My children are 10 and 7 so they are in school full time but juring the summer child care must be arranged. I'm lucky that my Mom is doing it for me and she charges alot less then any daycare. The children love staying with her so I'm very lucky but I have friends who have to send their kids to day care.

[Kanji_The_Wanderer]

Originally Posted by Nyororin

Since when was the father watching his own kids considered a "babysitter"!?!?!

I didn't mean the father being the babysitter. I meant does he ever watch the children? Or do men have to work in Japanese society? I would imagine that if the man of the family didn't work, he'd be made fun of and and treated like an outsider in public. That's my guess. There are families in the US who the mother works, and the father is at home. I am sure this does not happen in Japan.

[Nyororin]

Originally Posted by Kanji_The_Wanderer

I didn't mean the father being the babysitter. I meant does he ever watch the children? Or do men have to work in Japanese society? I would imagine that if the man of the family didn't work, he'd be made fun of and and treated like an outsider in public. That's my guess. There are families in the US who the mother works, and the father is at home. I am sure this does not happen in Japan.

I`m sure it does occasionally happen. I`ve heard of some stay-at-home fathers. The general response by other men is "いいなぁ". I seriously doubt anyone would make fun of him.

But yes, if the mother is staying home, then it is usually pretty necessary for the father to work in order to survive.

I seriously cannot imagine someone being made fun of out in public though...

Anyway, fathers do often watch the children. I mean, they`re their children after all.

[Kanji_The_Wanderer]

Originally Posted by Nyororin

I`m sure it does occasionally happen. I`ve heard of some stay-at-home fathers. The general response by other men is "いいなぁ". I seriously doubt anyone would make fun of him.

But yes, if the mother is staying home, then it is usually pretty necessary for the father to work in order to survive.
I seriously cannot imagine someone being made fun of out in public though...
Anyway, fathers do often watch the children. I mean, they`re their children after all.

What's the general response by other men? My PC can't read Japanese, it shows it as little boxes.... >_>

Wow that is interesting. I had always imagined that in the Japanese society, that the men have to be the leaders of the family and work. A lot of times, the way woman are treated in Japan (from what I have seen) is somewhat poor, and they don't always show them with respect. therefore I imagined that it was up to the man to run the family, and it would be shameful that a woman is doing it. I am glad I was mistaken though, that makes me happy ^_^ Everyone should be treated with respect. And in my opinion, woman should have more respect. since they carry on the race. (but that is a topic totally different.)

Yes, I have also seen father's watching the children in many cases. Sorry if I seem un-intelligent, I don't know much about Japanese society or way of life, seeing I have never been there before. I am glad that you are able to help and clear things up.

[luna2]

do all kids gota go pre-skool?????
i wana teach my kid but i also want them to hav a head start T_T

[Nyororin]

Originally Posted by Kanji_The_Wanderer

What's the general response by other men? My PC can't read Japanese, it shows it as little boxes.... >_>

Sorry, it`s sort of along the lines of "Wish I could do that...".

Wow that is interesting. I had always imagined that in the Japanese society, that the men have to be the leaders of the family and work. A lot of times, the way woman are treated in Japan (from what I have seen) is somewhat poor, and they don't always show them with respect. therefore I imagined that it was up to the man to run the family, and it would be shameful that a woman is doing it. I am glad I was mistaken though, that makes me happy ^_^ Everyone should be treated with respect. And in my opinion, woman should have more respect. since they carry on the race. (but that is a topic totally different.)

A lot of the "women treated unfairly" stuff is really a myth based on misinterpretation. I`ve covered it a lot in other topics, but basically from a "western" viewpoint, it seems that no one can believe a woman would ever possibly CHOOSE to leave her job and stay at home once she is married/has children. In their eyes, it looks to be "oppression"... Even though the women choose to do so of their own free will. So this big "women are inferior in Japan!" talk spreads. Most women choose to stay home with the kids. Some don`t. Most women are content to take a lower salary because of the lack of strings attached to it - if the company is paying you a lot there is a lot more pressure to continue working... They`ve invested a lot in you. But if it`s lower to begin with (I`m talking like 85% of the average male salary, not like incredibly low), there is very little pressure to keep working once you decide to quit for family reasons. Employers expect it, so everyone parts on good terms. There are companies out there that pay women full salaries - sometimes in the same company there will be two standards - and those are the type of women who generally continue to work. The only reason the lower salary is more common is because the women themselves PREFER it as it takes the pressure off of them in the future.

I personally don`t think either gender ranks above the other. Women can`t procreate alone. Eliminate either side and humans die out. There are indeed things that one gender can do which the other can`t. They balance each other out, and are therefore equally important.

Yes, I have also seen father's watching the children in many cases. Sorry if I seem un-intelligent, I don't know much about Japanese society or way of life, seeing I have never been there before. I am glad that you are able to help and clear things up[/b]

I didn`t mean to sound like you were being silly. It just made me laugh.

[t3hcur3]

Originally Posted by Nyororin

There is no "daycare" of the US sort in Japan.

In order to get a license, these places have to be checked regularly, etc.

Besides that, there really aren`t that many scary families, unclean conditions, etc. Remember, we`re talking about Japan here.

I didn't know we americans were so awful.