I Love You

noodle · (#1 (**permalink**))

"I LOVE YOU"...

I was having a conversation earlier with a Japanese girl. She said to me. "In western countries, I hear the three words I LOVE YOU a lot, why is that?". That got me wondering something. Why do you think oriental countries don't speak of their love as much as western countries?

CarleyGee · (#2 (**permalink**))

No idea. Around where I am, the people my age don't say it often.
Or at least I'm not paying much attention to it. ^_^ Most teenagers
don't think of loving someone as something more important. They
probabley think they love their girlfriend because they're dating..
idk, that's confusing?

Suki · (#3 (**permalink**))

Yeah I've had Asian people ask that very same question to me as well. I don't think it's got anything to do with them being introvert though, it's more of a cultural thing

kamelreds21 · (#4 (**permalink**))

Maybe they believe in just showing affection instead of saying words, either way I don't believe in love, only attraction and infatuation.

koaku · (#5 (**permalink**))

Can be that because the religion is much more taken into account in these regions ?and than people one learnt to keep them feelings really dunno..

noodle · (#6 (**permalink**))

Quote:

Originally Posted by kamelreds21

Maybe they believe in just showing affection instead of saying words, either way I don't believe in love, only attraction and infatuation.

I'm not so sure about that... She gave me an example of a TV AD in Japan. It started off with a guy holding a present and saying into the mirror "Dad, I love you". He said this 4 or 5 times... Then the ad went onto when he actually gave the gift to the father. When he gave the gift he just said "Dad..." and then the ad finished by a voice saying "it doesn't matter if you say it or not"

Akoni · (#7 (**permalink**))

There is no way you can -not- belive in love. It isnt about hearts and mushy feelings. It's about genuinly caring for someone or something. Attraction and Infatuation are just feelings you get that are instant, love is something much deeper. Sometimes the word "love" is used too loosly to mean you like someone you have an attraction to. That is probably why Asians use the word loosly sometimes or get confused of its usage. Correct me if I'm wrong.

kamelreds21 · (#8 (**permalink**))

Quote:

Originally Posted by Akoni

There is no way you can -not- belive in love. It isnt about hearts and mushy feelings. It's about genuinly caring for someone or something. Attraction and Infatuation are just feelings you get that are instant, love is something much deeper. Sometimes the word "love" is used too loosly to mean you like someone you have an attraction to. That is probably why Asians use the word loosly sometimes or get confused of its usage. Correct me if I'm wrong.

Well, there is no set definition for love, it's subjective and different for each person, just like happiness. What I should of said is I don't believe in "true love" meaning I don't think people are destined to be together and/or complete each other, I honestly believe some (very few) people get lucky and find a companion that fulfills their desires but the majority of people end up settling for less. If you consider what exactly is a relationship it's just a good/best friend who you are intimate with, I guess you could call that Love but I don't see it as such. And yes I've had relationships, I dated a korean/viet american girl for 4.5 years and what people don't understand is that you can "love" someone one day and meet someone new the next who changes your life forever. Things change, people change.

Yuna7780 · (#9 (**permalink**))

Just the Japanese are more reserved than Americans. Being polite in other countries is greatly emphasized, and in Japan saying,"I love you," is sort of like... PDA shown in a negative way in America. lol I'm not saying PDA and saying your affection is the SAME, but try to use your mind to understand.

jpdrag0n · (#10 (**permalink**))

yes...PDA in America is not "common" but its there alot of times. I know girls who wont kiss guys in public here because its embarassing and kind of looked down upon generally in japanese society. im not saying people dont kiss in public here...they do...just not as much as other countries. getting back to the point, people dont really say "i love u" when for example, youre leaving somewhere. in the US, i sometimes used to say 'i love u' to my gf when i was leaving school or something. but saying 'suki dayo' or 'aishiteru' is kind of strong or actually maybe redundant. americans use 'i love u' loosely while other countries attach strong feelings to that phrase.