Newlywed concerns.

[MissMisa]

Originally Posted by JoshAussie

I didnt have to read all that to reply to it.. i already said that by the way you wrote it your implying all women think they get in the way, whether you like it or not.. if you didnt mean it.. write it a way that doesnt imply it

ill admit i took the twat referance a differant way.. ow about a pint at tha local ey

i dont want to be a lawyer anyway

But I didn't imply it, you assumed it. You could say 'People like pink.' It doesn't say everyone likes pink, does it? No. It's the same thing. It's not implying everyone likes pink, either, it's just not specifying. I would never imply that everyone thinks a certain way, because for everything that exists there will be someone that disagrees.

Anyway, this is off topic, so if you want to carry it on PM me, but there really is no point since it's not me who didn't understand what I wrote -_-=

[Paul11]

In Japan, it is said that a bride wears a white dress, like a clear slate, so she can take on the colors of her husband. The point is, that a traditional girls (and most Japanese become more traditional as they grow up and marry) will do things to please her husband, at least at first. Enjoy it before you guys become comfortable and it wears off. Unless there's some type of issue, she's just devoted to you,

[superbike81]

I didn't really think about it that way, as more of a tradition thing. Good post! Thanks!

[Paul11]

I've been in an internation marriage for 10 years and lived in both countries. If you are both mature and level headed, then things should be fine. The first year is the most difficult. It is imperitive you learn to understand Japanese culture, language and psychology so you can understand your new wife.

If you have that understanding, then you won't experience the international marriage "difficulties" but have more intersting things the learn about each other and your relationship.

A relationship shouldn't take a lot of work. You know you're with the right person if it is relaxed and it is not difficult.

[MMM]

How long did you know your wife before you got married?

If you are planning on having children, then don't get breast implants. Bs can swell to DDs after birth, and the body isn't expecting the extra baggage.

I have never heard of newlyweds going through this issue. You should be as happy as rabbits. I agree with Nyororin...

[Nyororin]

Originally Posted by superbike81

As long as she prepares her body for the extra weight, I don't see there being too many problems.

And just exactly how does she plan on going about this? Unless she "trains" herself with big weights adhered to her chest, there isn`t a whole lot you can do. It isn`t about training for carrying the weight - it`s that if the weight is there, it`s going to be pulling and causing problems. It`s not a back pack or something you can really practice at... And I doubt she realizes it, as Japan has a very romanticized view of breasts. There aren`t a whole lot of big ones around to have a realistic view.

But, believe me, I've told her about all these things, and she's read about them herself, and she still wants to do it. I'm not going to argue with something that she and I both want equally.

If you`re not going to reconsider it - then there is no real point in asking around about it. If you both really want this, and are both completely accepting of the possible complications - then there is no reason not to, I presume.

For me, however, no matter how nice it may seem in the short term... I would never be willing to allow my partner to go through an unnecessary procedure that at worst could end in death. Small risks are still risks - and I don`t think this is something necessary enough to put someone I love at risk for.

To each his own though, I suppose.

[JoshAussie]

Originally Posted by Nyororin

as Japan has a very romanticized view of breasts.

hi nyororin

just wondering what you meant by that? i didnt know there view of breasts differed from.. i guess Australia.. could you please explain to me?

or anyone else?

[AlwaysPEPSI]

Originally Posted by Nyororin

This sounds to me like she`s actually more scared of losing you than wanting to please you. I`d tread carefully, and make sure she knows that SHE is the person you want to be with, as you may be wading into some serious self esteem issues. Those sort of things can lead to MAJOR problems down the road as she ages, and comes to wonder if she is beating the tight little teenagers around.
Obviously, you want to spend the rest of your life with her, so think of the distant future too.

QFT QFT QFT!!!

[Nyororin]

Originally Posted by JoshAussie

hi nyororin

just wondering what you meant by that? i didnt know there view of breasts differed from.. i guess Australia.. could you please explain to me?

or anyone else?

Most women do not have big breasts. In fact, a large chunk of the population doesn`t even *have* breasts that can be measured.
I think it`s hard for women to form a realistic view of breasts when they aren`t exposed to any outside of media, where they are painted as the perfect sexual body feature.

In other words, women are often completely shocked to find that larger breasts actually have *weight*. That they really NEED bras to support them. That they aren`t eternally perky.

I have several friends who were seriously appalled to discover that once they got pregnant and their breasts swelled, that they had to wear a bra. They never felt it necessary prior to that - bras were decorative underwear. Not "support".

That`s also a problem, as clothing makers share that view, so bras are not designed with anything other than looking cute in mind. Good luck finding something that hold the breasts in properly, let alone supports them well enough to prevent shoulder/back pain. I have larger-than-the-average-Japanese (but probably pretty normal US sized) breasts, and finding clothes that fit properly is a battle in futility. Japanese sizes themselves aren`t an issue... Except for the bust. If the bust fits, then everywhere else is frustratingly baggy. But if it`s something supposedly designed for a larger bust, it assumes you won`t be wearing a bra and shows the shoulder (as obviously, if you have those assets, you`ll want to be showing them off.)

I consider this to be a romanticized view, as there is no exposure to the reality of breasts... Even if it`s a mundane bit of reality like them having real weight and needing support, without mentioning the "bad" bits like back pain, etc.

[MMM]

I think the greater issue is his wife's self-esteem issue. I agree she is doing whatever she can to "keep" him above "please" him. and the OP's concerns are legit. That's why I ask how long he knew her before marrying her.

It doesn't sound like watching porn together is a good idea, as she thinks she need to look like an porn idol to keep him interested.