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GENERAL (Offline)
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Smile 12-03-2008, 05:21 PM

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Originally Posted by Kaoru1981 View Post
I'm a Malaysian working in Shanghai. I met with a J-guy nearly a year ago during a tour trip in Xi'An. We had a great one day trip together and exchanged contact. We have been keeping in touch through emails and msn on and off since then. We went for another trip in China with one of my friend in August. I went for a tour trip in Japan in Sep and he's a great host, brought me to the places I want to visit and finish work earlier than usual during weekdays to meet up for dinner. Last month, we went to Beijing together for a short trip and we also meet up when he's on business trip to Shanghai.

I am so very confused now whether he just treat me as a friend or travel mate or what? I think I like him since it's quite comfortable to be with him and he's very gentlemen. When I express that I'm having great trips with him, he too replies the same and wish to travel with me again. The thing is, he never really say anything which I can conclude as he likes me. He's very caring and I think able to remember the things I said and what I likes. But I really don't know if that's due to his good nature and politeness or I mean something special to him.

Anyone here who are from Japan or understand Japan culture well, please help! Could he have hinted anything while I still don't get it? I don't quite know how he interact with people daily to assess whether he's treating me somewhat special or just like a normal friend.

We're going for a trip to Vietnam end of this month. If he's probably just treating me as a normal friend, I should adjust myself and stop putting any hope that we might progress further. After all, he's a nice travel mate to go out with.

Really need help here as I'm getting more frustrated and confused as days past if I don't know where I should place myself. Thanks in advanced.

By the way, he's in his early thirties and I'm in my late tweenties.
dear sister .. i wish you happines in your life

ummmm .. it is lovely to find some one to care of us .. but it is hard if we didn't conclude that in perfect way ..

as you are girl you r emotional creature .. wanting for love .. however man usually want sex more than love .. and when he got it he may find another girl to fulifil his emotional & sexual needs .. just as an animal ..

so .. why didn't you tell him about your question directly & looking to his eyes & respondes .. no shame in that .. it is may difficult to ask directly but that conclude it soon ..

ask him also about marriage & his life styles .. you may found another girl during his speech and so you will know your position ..

briefly .. if you have problem with someone however it is kind .. ask him no aothers ..
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12-03-2008, 05:22 PM

Sorry i kinda cut in half way in the conversation and only got the jist of your first post. A serious long distance relationship at your age could be pretty difficult. I know I'd find it hard if my girlfriend lived in the next country and we are both only 21 years old.

You should really think about the implications of this before you find out about how he really feels


I'm sorry for all the bad stuff I said and all the feelings I hurt.. Please forgive me
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12-03-2008, 05:29 PM

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Originally Posted by GENERAL View Post
dear sister .. i wish you happines in your life

ummmm .. it is lovely to find some one to care of us .. but it is hard if we didn't conclude that in perfect way ..

as you are girl you r emotional creature .. wanting for love .. however man usually want sex more than love .. and when he got it he may find another girl to fulifil his emotional & sexual needs .. just as an animal ..

so .. why didn't you tell him about your question directly & looking to his eyes & respondes .. no shame in that .. it is may difficult to ask directly but that conclude it soon ..

ask him also about marriage & his life styles .. you may found another girl during his speech and so you will know your position ..

briefly .. if you have problem with someone however it is kind .. ask him no aothers ..

I do think he's kind of different as nothing happened between us though we had spent nights in the same room during our trips...

I had asked him in msn about the type of girls he liked long time ago, although his answer made me think...hmmm, isn't the person he described sounds like myself?
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12-03-2008, 05:33 PM

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Originally Posted by SHAD0W View Post
Sorry i kinda cut in half way in the conversation and only got the jist of your first post. A serious long distance relationship at your age could be pretty difficult. I know I'd find it hard if my girlfriend lived in the next country and we are both only 21 years old.

You should really think about the implications of this before you find out about how he really feels

I know that, and I think both of us are old enough to overcome such barriers if the relationship is confirmed. However, if this is not confirmed, I'll just have to plan the next steps of my life without him. Therefore, how things going towards between us could really affect what I decide to do next and where I would be going to. For me, one year is long enough to decide if you like the person or not, even though you may need more time to see if the person is suitable to be your life partner or not. For me, without even proceeding to gf/bf, it would be hard to think about anything further as I believe many of the decisions need to be decided by both parties together
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12-03-2008, 05:39 PM

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Originally Posted by Kaoru1981 View Post
I know that, and I think both of us are old enough to overcome such barriers if the relationship is confirmed. However, if this is not confirmed, I'll just have to plan the next steps of my life without him. Therefore, how things going towards between us could really affect what I decide to do next and where I would be going to. For me, one year is long enough to decide if you like the person or not, even though you may need more time to see if the person is suitable to be your life partner or not. For me, without even proceeding to gf/bf, it would be hard to think about anything further as I believe many of the decisions need to be decided by both parties together
In that case, why don't you do as I said and go in for the kiss, let him decide wether hes going to be in your life plan or not.


I'm sorry for all the bad stuff I said and all the feelings I hurt.. Please forgive me
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12-03-2008, 05:46 PM

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Originally Posted by Kaoru1981 View Post
I do think he's kind of different as nothing happened between us though we had spent nights in the same room during our trips...

I had asked him in msn about the type of girls he liked long time ago, although his answer made me think...hmmm, isn't the person he described sounds like myself?
so you will be just a dreamy girl ..

however you talked and asked about him .. did you really sure about your own feelings ..

do you really have sufficient love that you can agree to be your future husband & having baby from him ??

and imagin if he is really love you specially .. did you ask your self what end of that love ??

it is not enough to know if he love you or not .. or he is just kind or honest person .. you must sure that he has the ability to protect you and share the responsability of life ..

love is not just beautful dream & trips & fun time .. it is also to be care of each other and co operate in difficult situations ..

you must test him practically .. tell him about your troubles or make a trouble and test his reaction with you & you will realize how extent he cares about you .. and what you are for him ..
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12-03-2008, 05:47 PM

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Originally Posted by SHAD0W View Post
In that case, why don't you do as I said and go in for the kiss, let him decide wether hes going to be in your life plan or not.
what a shame cheap way .. kissing is only in movies .. real is differ
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12-03-2008, 05:50 PM

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what a shame cheap way .. kissing is only in movies .. real is differ
haha.... not really x]
depends who you're with

but yeah.... kissing is a fun way to start a romantic relationship
>.>



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In the darkness under the moon he plots
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12-03-2008, 06:01 PM

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haha.... not really x]
depends who you're with

but yeah.... kissing is a fun way to start a romantic relationship
>.>
kissing is just way to deliver sexual hormones .. but it can't asure you a real love

ih
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12-03-2008, 06:06 PM

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Originally Posted by GENERAL View Post
kissing is just way to deliver sexual hormones .. but it can't asure you a real love

ih
is it really? =3

not sure about you.... >.>'''

but i can kiss my gf just to let her know that i love her
or i can kiss her to let her know that i wanna have sex o.O"
it all depends on the context x]

oh and if you kiss your mom? =3
is that delivering your little hormones to her? ^_^



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