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princessmarisa (Offline)
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11-11-2010, 06:20 PM

Whether this is hearsay or not, I seem to have quite a lot in my head about Japanese love hotels. I would love to cite references I really would, but as most knowledge I just kept the info, not where I first read or heard it, so take with a pinch of salt!

Many Japanese live with their parents until they get married, mainly for economical/financial reasons. Similar to in the U.K if they don't "escape" into their own little flat after leaving Uni and dorm rooms, they may end up back at home for many years.

This makes dating impractical in that you can't take even a quite serious boyfriend back home to stay over and spend cosy time together, whether this includes sex or not, while Mum, Dad and little brother are all in.

In this situations couples choose to stay in a hotel together, I know this happens in the UK too for people in similar situations, just seems that Japanese hotels cashed in on the idea, and started making hotels that cater especially for couples who want just a couple hours alone together not in a public place such as a restaurant.

Once (if) the relationship gets serious enough to introduce to the parents, they may still choose not to stay in the small, paperthin(literally) walls of Japanese houses with the parents in the next room.

The so called love-hotels also get used for one-night stands, affairs and anything else you can imagine due to the convenience, however I doubt this was the original intention of them.

Spin off hotels offer themes, from the relatively harmless cute/romantic pink and fluffy covered in hearts type all the way up to catering for the serious fetish markets. Extreme examples of these tend to be those that hit western news, as "shock horror those Japanese perverts are at it again"
As always this is not the norm, otherwise it wouldn't be news right

Most Japanese business/budget hotels seem to also offer a on the night, or by the hour rate if you know who to ask or where to look.


Fighting ignorance and slaying a few narutards whilst I am at it.

Last edited by princessmarisa : 11-11-2010 at 06:23 PM.
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missprincess (Offline)
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11-11-2010, 06:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by evanny View Post

sooo...go and be virgin and stop saying the dumbest things about the part of the world that you have gotten to know via one tv show.

there wouldn't be so many divorces.
1. first of if you dont have a problem jumping from one person to the next like fleas on a dog it doesnt mean that everyone who doesnt do so is bad, I have no respect for people who are sexually promiscuous


2. second generally speaking i dont know where documentaries are like where u come form but in England they have specialist journalists who lived in these areas for years (mostly from birth) research these issues and present them to the world who wouldn’t otherwise know about them! thats the whole point. your trying to tell me that everything you know about africa you actually went and found out yourself? or let me guess you read it somewhere or saw it somewhere. documentaries are not less credible then books and written media or whatever u seem to use, so yeh if i did see it on a 'programme' presented by someone who had more experience and knowledge then me in that area i would believe it! and guess what i'm not gonna be the only one who does that!


3. third the things i sed werent stuff i made up one day becoz i had a serious prob with Christians, i actually gave you link (if you managed to walk outta whatever lala land you seem to live in where Christians destroyed all known humanity and see it) and i directly quoted from that! so its not just my own submissions but infact research conducted by credible organisations from africa which are saying these things, if you wanna say that they dont know what their talking about either then you are even more deluded and egocentric then i first assumed!

4. last you think sex is the only reason people get divorced? LMAO OMG i feel sorry for your missus! nuff sed


SORRY ADMIN I'LL GET BACK TO TOPIC NOW! I'm tired of arguing with someone has no idea what there talking about anyway, so im jutst going to ignore them from now on

thanks everyone for your views ON THE TOPIC its defo enlightening to hear about some of your experiences
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dogsbody70 (Offline)
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11-11-2010, 08:49 PM

mmm well responding to some of the earlier posts that there seems to be a view that its better to have sex before marriage-- so you know what it will be like when you take the plunge. So what if the partner doesn't fit the bill/


marriage is not all about sex-- thank Heaven. Love means so much more than sex. I've been married for over forty six odd years-------------


I hope whoever dates who in Japan that there is always respect and not just one night stands.

Promiscuity can lead to many bad things including unwanted diseases and children.
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dogsbody70 (Offline)
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11-11-2010, 09:11 PM

Dating in Japan

interesting info. Does anyone agree with this?
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steven (Offline)
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11-12-2010, 12:16 AM

Just getting through the first couple of paragraphs, you can tell this is written from the perspective of a foreigner about foreigners dating Japanese.

I can agree with a lot of what it is saying though, and kind of apply it to dating in general. Some of it is a bit... huh? though.

While a lot of people argue that Japanese have a hard time meeting new people after a certain age, if one is active it isn't as hard as it's made out to be. There are many places that offer 習い事, which is like "classes" I guess you could say. So while I've never heard of "salsa dance classes", I have heard of a number of other kinds of things like that. This isn't stuff that is really geared for foreigners, but it's not like foreigners are excluded or anything. At places like that you can meet all kinds of new people both men and women. Even if you meet someone of the same sex, you can sometimes find yourself in their "circle" of friends (who might be from high school or middle school or work or something like that) and you can get dates like that, especially if you are at the marrying age.

As far as the age separation thing being normal goes.... I don't think so. Men can be about 10 years older than their wives, but if one looks significantly older than the other I don't think it'd be considered normal. It's just that people won't "turn their heads" out of respect. Sometimes you'll see an old man walking around with a 20-something year old lady who obviously isn't his daughter. Nobody thinks that's normal... it's probably just a guy going on a date with a lady from some bar somewhere.

The sudden "shunning" by means of no-mail sounds kind of right. I can't imagine an intimate relationship ending up like that though. It's true that it might happen at the beginning of a relationship, but I wouldn't say it's normal after many years of a relationship.

I don't know though, maybe all my views are skewed. At any rate, that article should be titled "dating in Japan: a foreigner's guide" or something like that. It doesn't really explain the process of a Japanese couple too well. If at all, just purely by coincidence.
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evanny (Offline)
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11-12-2010, 05:27 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by missprincess View Post

4. last you think sex is the only reason people get divorced? LMAO OMG i feel sorry for your missus! nuff sed


stop pulling sh*t from the air. i said there would be less divorces because sex is a part of a healthy marriage and the better partners are at it the greater chances they won't feel the need to look for it elsewhere.

you think if you saw it on tv its true? yea - i saw a programme where they said that the moon landing was fake and they tried to prove it - and they did. and yet i could disprove all of the points because im not a fcking monkey who believes everything on tv and i actually have working knowledge of things. not to say your programme was false but i feel that you feel pretty smart just after turning on Discovery channel.

So when i said that those beliefs are damaging health of thousands of people that's because i know that. church even comes out and says it. so...im so annoyed by your damn posts that i'm just going to ask you directly:

Are you saying that i am wrong when i said that thousands get sick because of Churches strong beliefs against protected sex and the resulting deaths as a result?

P.S when you add to your paragraphs "1.2.3" you don't need to follow them by writing down "first.second.third" - here everyone is familiar with numbers.

Last edited by evanny : 11-12-2010 at 11:51 AM.
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steven (Offline)
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11-12-2010, 06:59 AM

I think that there are still a lot of interesting things that could be said about what the OP was asking about, so it would be a shame if this thread were to go because it turned into a religious discussion. I know the temptation to go into all of that stuff, believe me.

As far as sex being a reason for divorce goes... I've heard of a lot of divorces in Japan that were because of it (as in cheating). I have no statistics to go by, but I think that has something to do with a lot of divorces these days in Japan. I'm sure there are many other reasons though.
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dogsbody70 (Offline)
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11-12-2010, 01:17 PM

well I am certain there can be many reasons for divorces. We have so many in this country-- or split partners.

Often simply the stress of modern life and shortage of money can be a big contribution.


I read that many salary men go off with their colleagues to certain places

Have a good time away from the wife etc.

It would be good to get the woman's Point of view.


Unhappy sexual relations can be caused by many things. But I wonder how many married Japanese women are loyal in their marriages-- or whether they have affairs?


They are all human after all. I still say there is more to a good marriage than sex. Once children come along that is an extra consideration surely.

If women have to work and place the child/ren into day care-- that can cost a lot.
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dogsbody70 (Offline)
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11-12-2010, 01:52 PM

About.com: http://www.salonmag.com/people/feature/2000/08/07/coupling

Here is an item-- its a bit like speed dating here in UK I think.
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protheus (Offline)
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11-12-2010, 02:57 PM

For someone like me (too shy to "get a date"), would be a good idea even in this part of the world, but for many of the other people that use it, it's just a way of "getting layed" (excuse the expression used, but this is the reality) cheap - i mean instead of her paying for*, and him paying for*, they get together and both obtain what they wanted at a much lower cost.

* it's implied I mean services, sexual oriented ones.


Reverse psychology, "dear Watson", reverse psychology.
"Manganese? Is that manga language?" - lol?

Last edited by protheus : 11-12-2010 at 03:07 PM.
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