How well do you deal with rejection?

[japan1234567]

Originally Posted by missprincess

if youve ever been rejected by something or someone in your life, how well did you or do you deal with it?

because i recently got turned down for a job and its seriously annoying me! so just wanted to know how other people deal with it.

thanks
peace!

I saw with my own eyes how often disrespectful insolent candidates got the job than better qualified polite candidates!
The truth is that many executives choose the candidates who are having same interest like them! It depends on the personality and the level of the executive.

Surely a nonserious executive won't choose a perfect and a very serious candidate. Don't worry, just keep your level. It's never a good idea to work for nonserious executive! This relation won't last...

[OHayou]

Originally Posted by japan1234567

I saw with my own eyes how often disrespectful insolent candidates got the job than better qualified polite candidates!

I guess we have to define what "disrespectful" and "insolent" mean. "Disrespectful" to who? "Insolent" to who? The reason "nice guys finish last" is not because it's not good to be a "nice" guy but a lot of "nice guys" don't have an opinion, a voice, and are afraid to rock the boat. In career OR relationships.

Originally Posted by japan1234567

The truth is that many executives choose the candidates who are having same interest like them! It depends on the personality and the level of the executive.

I guess this goes for a lot of us right!? We typically try to seek out people who are very similar to us but it's not necessarily a good thing. It's a weak center based on insecurity to try to exclusively surround yourself with people who are exactly like yourself. Diversity is what makes a relationship strong in either career or relationship.

Originally Posted by japan1234567

Surely a nonserious executive won't choose a perfect and a very serious candidate. Don't worry, just keep your level. It's never a good idea to work for nonserious executive! This relation won't last...

I see opinion and not fact. I know a lot of business owners who would laugh at the "perfect and a very serious candidate" because if you knew that then you have a great talent. Most people put on their "representative ass kicking persona" when applying for a job. Job execution is an entirely different thing. Besides...'very serious' and 'dedicated' are very different things. Some companies and executives LIKE outgoing, party type personalities while others like very introverted, serious personalities. How can we standardize this?

[japan1234567]

Originally Posted by OHayou

I guess we have to define what "disrespectful" and "insolent" mean. "Disrespectful" to who? "Insolent" to who? The reason "nice guys finish last" is not because it's not good to be a "nice" guy but a lot of "nice guys" don't have an opinion, a voice, and are afraid to rock the boat. In career OR relationships.

After the interview we (the team) show the candidates the kind of tasks which should be executed. Insolent candidates are all the time making negative comments and judging how stupid the way we do this job! And they would do it better! Indeed this kind of candidates got each time the job because they are more promising!! And each time the result was catastrophic: The work was badly done. Customers were angry and escalated because of bad delivered job and additionally complained about insulting treatment. We (the team) was obliged to do overtime for correcting the badly done job and for writing reports, statements and apologetic e-mails. After some months these candidates were asked to leave!

I agree with you that nice good qualified guys finish last. To be humble despite good qualification isn't helping a lot. Future employer want to see some personal enthusiasm and motivation. That means to be less introvert.

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I guess this goes for a lot of us right!? We typically try to seek out people who are very similar to us but it's not necessarily a good thing. It's a weak center based on insecurity to try to exclusively surround yourself with people who are exactly like yourself. Diversity is what makes a relationship strong in either career or relationship.
[/quote]


In general it's unfortunately like you mentioned and it's a weak point. It shouldn't really disturb if someone is very different, less funny or very quiet etc. very important is to work hard, (try to work) exactly, to assume responsibility and to contribute in developing good technical process.

........................................................................... .............................................

I see opinion and not fact. I know a lot of business owners who would laugh at the "perfect and a very serious candidate" because if you knew that then you have a great talent. Most people put on their "representative ass kicking persona" when applying for a job. Job execution is an entirely different thing. Besides...'very serious' and 'dedicated' are very different things. Some companies and executives LIKE outgoing, party type personalities while others like very introverted, serious personalities. How can we standardize this?
[/quote]


I think it's a tough point. The executive has the influence. I remember once things went bad by a party type executive and his team. Customer threatened to cancel the contract if measures aren't taken. So the campany showed integrity/seriousness and fired this executive.

In a big campany it's very difficult to have control over every unit. So, unfortunately bad news should first come from disappointed customer. After action will be taken.

[OHayou]

Originally Posted by japan1234567

After the interview we (the team) show the candidates the kind of tasks which should be executed. Insolent candidates are all the time making negative comments and judging how stupid the way we do this job! And they would do it better! Indeed this kind of candidates got each time the job because they are more promising!! And each time the result was catastrophic: The work was badly done. Customers were angry and escalated because of bad delivered job and additionally complained about insulting treatment. We (the team) was obliged to do overtime for correcting the badly done job and for writing reports, statements and apologetic e-mails. After some months these candidates were asked to leave!

Hey Japan1234567, thanks for the reply!

It sounds like there is a person in a leadership role in this company that is making some poor decisions as of late. There is one thing to be motivated and outgoing but quite another to insult people and constantly make negative comments. Character is always shining and it is forged daily. When you see people who make disparaging remarks or insults you can tell they will contribute negatively to the culture.

Originally Posted by japan1234567

I agree with you that nice good qualified guys finish last. To be humble despite good qualification isn't helping a lot. Future employer want to see some personal enthusiasm and motivation. That means to be less introvert.

People skills are very important in this day and age I entirely agree with you. It is not only being less introverted but a better communicator. A lot of people mistake the fact that because they speak the language that they are a "good" communicator. I know people who are less fluent in English, for example, who are better communicators than natives who are quite skilled in the language. Less than 10% of the words you say make up communication.

Originally Posted by japan1234567

In general it's unfortunately like you mentioned and it's a weak point. It shouldn't really disturb if someone is very different, less funny or very quiet etc. very important is to work hard, (try to work) exactly, to assume responsibility and to contribute in developing good technical process.

Entirely agree with you Japan1234567.

Originally Posted by japan1234567

I think it's a tough point. The executive has the influence. I remember once things went bad by a party type executive and his team. Customer threatened to cancel the contract if measures aren't taken. So the campany showed integrity/seriousness and fired this executive.

In a big campany it's very difficult to have control over every unit. So, unfortunately bad news should first come from disappointed customer. After action will be taken.

You are right about the big company aspect and the many layers these type of companies. I work for a small company and if I need something done I can get it done. It is amazing the amount of layers within the corporations that tie up answers to simple questions.

[jasminoodle]

rejection naturally makes us feel like we are not wanted, or were rubbish but the best thing is to remember that this is not true in any case. im a christian so i usually pray about it, but if you are not religious i think its very important to surround yourself with people that you love. i do this too. the worst thing to do is to hide it away and act liek nothing is bothering yuou. yes, there is a timae and a place to let it out, but let it out weith somebody that you love who will listen to you and you will feel much better.
also, dont ever give up! whatever it may be, if you are rejected one time or a hundred times, dont EVER stop, because you are special