second chances? (long)

[Kayci]

Originally Posted by Bard

From my own experience, there're no such things as second chances. My last relationship with a woman ended very badly and there's nothing left between us but mutual acrimony and hostile feelings. I've made conciliatory steps towards her but some wounds just can't be stiched up; she's made it perfectly clear that she wants nothing to do with me.

Do what I've done: burn your bridges and move on.

But oddly enough, the relationship never ended badly. We stayed pretty close, nothing every got ugly...

I do have a hard time burning bridges, in any kind of relationship, even unhealthy ones... Of the four guys I dated in my life to be looked at somewhat serious or more, I only stopped talking to one. (And I feel I was pretty justified. Kind of object to being stalked while breaking up here.)

But with my friends, I keep almost all of them. Only lost three in the last ten years alone, in a not so cool manner, and two were because of they passed away.

Anyways, me and him talked last night. Some more came out in the open, so we will see how the next two weeks here, and the time after goes.

[samokan]

Love is sweeter the second time around so why not.

good luck to you

[dogsbody70]

they say that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

In truth wouldn't you be better to find someone who lives near you where you can have a proper relationship/


Long distance relationships may seem perfect but in reality one needs to really know a person intimately to really know them.

why not look around you--

[Kayci]

Originally Posted by dogsbody70

they say that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

In truth wouldn't you be better to find someone who lives near you where you can have a proper relationship/


Long distance relationships may seem perfect but in reality one needs to really know a person intimately to really know them.

why not look around you--

Thats the thing. We both tried. I actually got into relationships with people nearby, as in, same town, or even same state.

I knew him a lot when we were younger. spent a year together before dating.

I did look around, he looked around. I am not new nor naive to the pain and trouble of this kind of relationship.

[OHayou]

Originally Posted by Kayci

Dude, for the record, I was not offended. You had me laughing. I am sorry I was not clear ^^:

Edit; I dunno how I seem offended to where it sounded like I only wanted to hear a certain thing...I honestly was just thinking how funny your post was, and that song came to mind

No Kayci! *I'M* sorry .. when you just typed "trololol" I thought you were laughing me off and calling me a troll because of my super-laid-back way of answering your question when, in fact, there WAS some seriousness to it.

Anyway..just like in Team America... I cherish your friendship.

[dogsbody70]

there can only be pain in this kind of relationship really-- Lots of fantasy etc.

Go for the real thing that is available.

[nobora]

Yes, of course. I believe in second chances . Sometimes its unbelievable how someone can make you feel after being apart for such a very long time. Just be yourself and fate will do the rest.

[Kayci]

Originally Posted by dogsbody70

there can only be pain in this kind of relationship really-- Lots of fantasy etc.

Go for the real thing that is available.

real things hurt me more than this guy did. As I said, I have been with people nearby. I got more pain out of that.

In the end, near or far, this guy treated me the best, and made me the most happy....
Again, we will see how time will tell.

[Kayci]

Originally Posted by OHayou

No Kayci! *I'M* sorry .. when you just typed "trololol" I thought you were laughing me off and calling me a troll because of my super-laid-back way of answering your question when, in fact, there WAS some seriousness to it.

Anyway..just like in Team America... I cherish your friendship.

Well I know it was somewhat truthful, I just love it when people are funny about it.
But yeah...the next couple years are going to be a repeat of the first time, only this time i have oppurtunities to go back and forth more than I did in high school...but school and such is there too...

[OsakaBlue]

I think it's great that you two were able to reconnect after highschool. I do believe in second chances but like everyone has stated above, long-distance can be tough. There has to be a point to it basically, meaning one person has to make a sacrifice and move eventually. It seems like a fairy tale now because you're with him right now, but what happens afterwards? Will you be satisfied with seeing each other only twice a year? I was in a long distance relationship once and we saw each other once every few months until I made the decision to move to his state (half way across the US). We stayed together for over four years and were engaged. Then we broke up. I felt resentful that I gave up so much to be with him. I'm still in his state but he actually moved out of the state and I realized how alone I was here because I only hung out with his friends. I had to start all over. But I didn't want to move back to my own state (then again, who would...it's NJ). It took months (still is) for me to find my own group of friends. Luckily I was able to find a good job when I first moved here, but finding a new apartment on my own, being 'independent', etc... it's definitely tough.